💒 The Royal Wedding

:wedding: The Royal Wedding


Looking forward to the commemorative supplements when the first born comes along.


These are the times when the BBC, and the overwhelming majority of the MSM remind us just how far their tongues are shoved up the establishment rectum. Nicholas Witchell, even by his high standards, is surely taking obsequiousness to a different level. He must be getting through three pairs of underpants a day. The written press are worse, a barrage of brainwashing nonsense about fairytale weddings, and how the blushing bride to be is related to Shakespeare and distant royals. it’s only been a few days and already they are bigging her up to be a cross between Mother Theresa and Mahatma Ghandi.

What really pisses me off about all this is the contempt they must hold us in. `Let’s face it, Harry has got no more royal bloodline in him than me, or anyone else on this forum. It is the accepted truth, the camera doesn’t lie. But it cannot be talked about. Lets face it, the only ones who still believe that Charles is Harry’s natural father are children and the, thankfully dwindling, number of adults who believe that Cinderella is a documentary. The establishment know that we know, but still persist in sprinkling all the fairy dust, all the nonsense about what royal title Ms Markle will have etc etc. They really must have us down as thick. Good luck to them, but why on earth don’t they just have a quiet private wedding, for family and friends. But of course, that would mean the great unwashed wouldn’t be distracted from the fucking mess this country is in, courtesy of this very same establishment. Bread and Circuses is the correct expression i believe.


In my new role as fluffer to the rich I teach one the royal family. Thick as two short planks. Even the other thick kids take the piss.


Cinderella was a documentary?



Can’t believe the fuss being made over a couple of people who will get nowhere near the throne. What is it with this country and the Monarchy? The French got it right. Ollie Cromwell set us on the right path but then we backtracked. If we have to have a monarch, so be it. But get shot of all the minor royals and do away with this Duke and Duchess crap. It’s 2017 FFS!


It’s not about royalty…it’s about celebrity. The general public have followed this celebrity from birth so in some misguided way they associate him as “family”

I don’t understand it either…or perhaps I do as I’ve just explained it to you all. :lou_eyes_to_sky:


And all of a sudden he becomes much more interesting because he is getting married?

Pah! Most of the country need to get out more.


I’m sure they are a normal, well balanced couple with a fuck-ton of money and celebrity status. I mean what could possibly go wrong?



So here it is. The day before the big day.

Luckily, Netflix & Prime aren’t showing it, equally because it is Ramadan I refuse to be culturally inappropriate and go sit down a pub at one of the 50 quid admission “street parties”

How do you plan to avoid it all tomorrow?


Can’t wait for it to be over all the bloody cgi shit and photoshop memes filling my FB stream and ffs the daily fail…


Friend is having a royal wedding BBQ.

Now I appreciate that on face value it doesn’t seem like I have managed to swerve this, but…

My mates wife is a royal nutjob as is the Ayatollah. On our own with our respective wives we would in all likelihood be compelled to watch this shite. However, now the women have each other to crap on to, we blokes can manufacture a cooking catastrophe which can only be rectified by close attendance of the BBQ and copius amounts of beer / wine.





I’m no ton Facebook so that side is easy, Twitter I only follow what interests me.

As for the reast, the TV will be on kids channels (if it’s on) or I will be out and about enjoying the sunsheeeeinnnneee with the kids.


You expect sunshine a day in advance?

In England?

In Summer?



It’s going to be a scorching hot day tomorrow…


Is it not the FA cup final tomorrow?

wedding -Cup final

FFS people get a life

Harry needs your support :lou_sad:


Weather forecast is for beer in the garden & no TV coverage of a man marrying a woman weather (it always is in Cobham btw ).

Is a midday start too early?


I think I may have nixed my invite:



Well…what time does it KO?

Silly question really, all TV channels will be running blanket coverage from Sparrow Fart so I think the poor dog is going to get an extended walk in the morning.

The afternoon walk is likely to cover the cup final non-event. Poor little bugger, he’s 13 years old now and beginning to show his age…he’s going to be exhausted after tomorrow’s TV shit-fest. :lou_sad:


Have booked a massage and an opticians appointment. Partner is off to some football thing tomorrow pm. I may do some work too.

It’s going to be hard to avoid but will try my best.


Massage and optician appointment- weird combo @intiniki . Oh, you mean separately…

Just for one moment there I thought there was a niche market ripe for exploitation in the provinces…