Sitting on the hotel balcony sipping a vodka & listening to a tourist running his battery flat trying to start his car.
Heās German. Itās an Audi.
I learnt some new words other than Scheisse
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Iād go and hide if I were you Phil. Heāll be looking for someone to give him a bump-start when he run his battery flat. If itās an automatic youāll need to push it at 40 mph for it to start. 
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He tried to get his kids to do it.
Eventually some bloke came along with jump leads
Boooo
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I have found jump leads work on kid Goat if I want her to do anything too.
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The ābarge tripā threat not working any more?
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lol. I did manage to get her into a kayak in France.
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John Oliver
2 fried eggs on buttered toast with salt and pepper. Thatās been my brunch for 2 days on the trot
Has to be white pepper with eggs.
No - it has to be bacon, mushrooms, beans, tomatoes & hash browns with eggs (pepper optional)
Just saying.
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Donāt forget the black pudding and sausagesā¦
Ordered top to bottom of stack
1 Poached egg
1 slice of Laverstoke Park Farm Black pudding
Premium salted butter
Slice of toast
I think that is the only time you are allowed to legally use the word unctuous.
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Experienced my first proper Indian wedding this week.
4 days of various events and ceremonies. Itās been a truly unforgettable experience.
Nowt more deep or profound to say. Iv e just had the most lovely time, and hope others get to experience something like this at least once.
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Going out to catch the second half of the Everton game up the pub and bumping into an old mate who i havenāt seen for at least five years, last time i saw him was in Thailand. My plan was to have two or three beers, grab a takeaway and come home. It all went Pete Tong after the fourth beer. Six hours later here i am, a bit wobbly, but he hailed a black cab to take us down the lane so i am home safe and sound.
After the final whistle the pub thinned out a bit, with several disgruntled Evertonians drinking up and getting off. Was sat chatting to a group of Liverpool season ticket holders of many years standing, who all know i am a Saints fan, they all had good things to say about Danny Ings. They were genuinely sorry to see him go, a lot of good will towards him. On the rare occasions he played for them they were impressed with him, especially his commitment. One old guy told me that if he stays fit, Liverpoolās decision to let him go could come back to bite them on the arse. Letās hope heās right.
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Helping a family get housing via our local housing department in the same authority I work in (notorious for not providing housing). 
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When the a/c has been working for a whole hour & the temp has dropped from 32 to 29C
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Thatās good. Right?
It seems to have about 25% of the power from before the break down. It is better than the last 5 days for sure
After succumbing to the Ayatollahs request to install Jeff Bezosā spy equipment, watching Alexa point blank refuse to understand anything she says, and then promptly complying with the same request from me.
Also v funny that she feels the the need to say please to it every time.
Now this is special. My karaoke skills are legendary for all the wrong reasons, my Brother is well known around the South for his band The Zucchinis.
But this is another level.
This is my Niece smashing it at Reading and Leeds Festivals as a long time member of Kate Nashās band.
Living the dream
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