Old enough to do for Heseltine, and almost Thatcher as well.
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As long as it gets me off in 4 weeks time I dont care how old it is.
Even if itâs as old as Rooneyâs Tarts I am still climbing on her.
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I sat down last week to watch the strade Bianchi road race
I discovered that Eurosport is no more - now I have to pay those cunts at TNT if I want to watch any winter sports or cycling (2026 onwards the Tdf wonât be on terrestrial)
Someone once said that having competition will benefit the consumer - instead we are getting economically gang raped by the bastards
They show a fair bit of the snooker as well, which is how I discovered it had gone.
Dodgy stick man time
Or 2nd WiFi link and an old laptop/TV combo like poor people have to manage with
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Finding out Grandson spent this morning being filmed in close up carrying a Zombie up a hill, having Archery lessons, then getting a cup of tea with Danny BoyleâŚ
His well received suggestion?
Make 28 Decades laterâŚ
I went out to get free beerâŚ
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I actually understood all of it, for once
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That makes one of you.
Baggage handlers at Geneva or Gatwick!
Cunts have damaged my snowboard. Not killed her but sheâs not as pretty as she used to be.
Claiming on insurance but not holding my breath.
EasyJet cunts!
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I have to get up at 6am on Saturday.
It gets worse.
Because Mrs P_F is having a Treadmill delivered to assist my recovery.
Sigh
You know what they sayâŚKill or cure.
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My phone has picked up a virus which keeps putting an advert on every 2 mins for an add blocker. Which has now drained the battery, and the charger does not appear man enough to overcome this drain on it to charge it so I can try and eradicate the virus / malware.
Bollocks 
I ache.
Kitten has had a stressful day trying to answer WTF
Mrs P_F away on a girls Spa weekend climbing mountains so i will ease my pain with a steak and Languedoc or 3 later
I have got rid of the virus, but I had to reset the phone to do it. cannot restart it because they want to send a code to the phone number. I am in the middle of the fucking Atlantic ocean you donât have any cell towers here you cunts.
Itâs fucked until I get back to the beach.
I suppose the phone spontaneously visited the dodgy sites which provided it with said virus, all on itâs own?
Of course I have no idea how it got there only used sites that I have been using for years but have been receiving dodgy e-mail from South African addressâs maybe one of those slipped through.
Could be from a WiFi connection in an airport.
.always use a VPN he says obviously not doing so himselfâŚ
Scanned any QR Codes lately?
Do I look like a check out girl ?
Of course I havenât scanned a QR or Barcode 
⌠I believe the next gambit is that he caught it from a toilet seat.