Grab a miniature in Duty Free?
If they had any. Duty Free proper is before passport control.
Anyway made it
No wifi at Stansted, lousy mobile signal so managed to make pick up by daughter the old fashioned way - by SMS.
Feet up on sofa and Ĺşzzzzzzz
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Two pubs in the village.
Both out of stock of Real Ale.
No idea when will get restocked
Fvck sake.
Big raid of Aldi & or Lidl shortly.
Anything good happened on your trip so far Phil?
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Hell yes. Absolute nectar followed by an awesome Chicken Danshak, Popadoms, Onion Bhajis & Butter Naan.
Great stock of Ales acquired from Lidl as well.
And Heidi the Miniature Schnauser remembered me from last July & took me for a jog round the village.
Both of us worn out now
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The quality of CVâs i get sent, unsolicited or otherwise, are generally very poor. They come from recruitment consultants and Iâd say 90% of them do neither the consultant nor the candidate any favours at all. Strewn with poor grammar, they are generally badly worded and difficult to follow. If they are supposed to impress, they really donât.
I should say they are for âconstruction professionalsâ such as project managers and quantity surveyors. Admittedly itâs not the most cerebral of industries and iâm sure it is better in other industries, but these candidates still want paying a shitload of money . Iâve worked with many âlads on siteâ who possess a much greater ability to project their skills and talents than the professional CVâs do. Iâve started to keep a folder on the server with the worst examples, just so i can cheer myself up.
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Banks. It appears that when posting daily entries onto accounts, banks first post all outgoings, and then inputs.
In my case, this means that my accounts are shown overdrawn for a period, which triggers interest charges on agreed overdraft limits.
The resultant charges are, admittedly, very small (25p), if this happens to say 2,000,000 accounts, the bank then makes ÂŁ500,000 in charges.
Unless Iâm much mistaken, easy money methinks. Cunts.
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Inland revenue. While Iâm on the subject - years ago when I was paying huge amounts of tax, I suddenly (after 20 years of not receiving any) started getting tax returns to complete.
My tax affairs were very simple, but eventually I got fed up with doing it, missed the return date, and got a standard ÂŁ100 fine.
I later found out/worked out that they would issue 10,000,000 returns, and had calculated that there would be a 10% failure to return on time.
So - 1,000,000 fines of ÂŁ100 - easy money again.
Donât know whether they still do this, but aiming it at ordinary folk and getting this return is much easier than chasing rich cunts who employ accountants and lawyers to avoid paying tax at all, let alone any penalty!
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When I first moved out of the UK I told the Tax man I was leaving and they sent me back a letter saying that they would not send me anymore tax forms and I was out of the system.
So when I received a letter to say I owed GBP100.00 and that they had collected it from my National insurance number account I was peeved to say the least. I sent a copy of the letter stating I was not to receive any more forms and that I had never received a form in the first place so how could it be late? I requested that they refund the money immediately along with interest that they would have made on the money they had taken.
I received GBP 110.00 back. This same thing went on for 3 years them taking the money and then giving me 110.00 back about 2 months later.
Wankers.
Absolutely this
What, that it appears to be gibberish? 
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Itâs Friday, itâs 5 oâclock and itâs Crackerjack!!!
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Heathen.
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CRACKERJACK!
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The Sally James garter spot.
This is not a little annoyance by the way
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Bank card expiring and having to update every fucking online account with the new details
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Iâm at Airport Security.
Iâve removed the 18kg of goodies in their Lidl cool bag - they go through.
My almost empty carry on is pinged for a search.
I open it 10x5 packs of Rizla papers 2 x Poundland gardening gloves.
The gloves have mini clippers stapled inside them basically pointy metal scissors. I never noticed when I bought them
Some shrugs & laughs, thay are small, allowed through.
Annoyance?
I could have used them to open the fucking beers
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Explaing that the reason you didnt buy her flowers because you wont recognise International Womens Day until she recognises Steak & Bliwjob day is very unwise
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Unless they have taken a selfie pointing at a location sign I wish people would stop using the phrase âI am hereâ whilst using a mobile phone.
You could be any bloody where.
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