Just walking to the pub on the island for dinner when a lost Royal Mail lorry driver asked me the way back to the port. (Iām in Newport and he needs to get to Cowes).
Cunt.
Does he think I look like a local?
I should have made him count my fingers.
As Dirty Harry probably saidā¦āDo I have six digits or only five?ā.
I hope he felt lucky as I gave him directions to West Cowes instead of East Cowes out of spite.
When I think of you on the island, this always comes into my mindā¦
Just take care and steer clear of river trips.
Now that Iām not trekking north and south every week, bletch needs his one-on-one weirdness.
He goes to see David Icke, you know.
You remind me of Jon Voight - youāve got a real perty mouth.
I bet you smoke a pipe at weekends and when people challenge you on the impact on your health, I bet you contrarily say āCeci nāest P
pas une pipeā.
Talks a lot of sense does Icke. 
Unfairly demeaned, imho. 
Bloody power cut. Looks like a substation has gone, taken out us & next door village.
Just as I opened my 1st bottles of Bacardi & Coke for a year &:sat on the sofa to binge watch more of The Witcher.
Now, do I dare open the fridge & freezer for a 2nd pint?
Open the door
I done fizzics.
#latentheat
Sitting at the feet of the master to simply touch the hem of his robe. May you see the light my brother and pass his wisdom to all you meet.
I trust youāre wearing turquoise? 
Little else dear brotherā¦
To be fair to Icke, even if @saintbletch adopted Ickeās turquoise shell suit of the 1980s heād be better dressed.
What do you mean āifā?
David is a fashionista and an inspiration to all - humans and subterranean lizards alike.
Have you won the bet?
Of courseā¦that is in the absence of Bletch. 
ā¦ Fucking fucking cunting fucking Breast Cancerā¦
I think that counts as more than āa little annoyanceā 
Do you feel like elaborating?
Mrs Mot diagnosed yesterday ā¦ so was feeling angryā¦ thankfully itās early stage so prognosis is good as it can beā¦ I am angry as Mrs MoT has been through the Cancer mill already with leukaemia in her 20s so seems a bit unfair to meā¦ Treatment starts next week so itās going to be a tough next 4-6 months for herā¦ but we just have to get on with it.
Apologies for the the odd shitty post on what should be a more light hearted thread
Mrs Bletch has been through the same early diagnosis with an excellent outcome, Frank.
Thoughts are with you and yours, mate.
