Dubai Phil is YOUR on the spot reporter. You got that news BEFORE mainstream media (they were standing next to me)
Fuck, you look miserable- I take back what I said this morning
My moments today.
Poults & Rory played worse than me for the 1st 5 holes then on the 6th, a group of American fans in fancy dress shouted out âHeâll leave it shortâ with the lads 3 Down.
The snapper was sat next to me
Followed by this to the Yanks from Rory
Walking up to the greens and seeing the reverse of this
Sitting next to this snapper
Standing next to Casey
Checking all around, diving into a players portaloo on the 11th for a pee, coming out and finding a queue of 2 - Matt Kuchar & Lee Westwood (I got a laugh with my sheepish - sorry guys)
On 13th sitting next to Jim Furyk when Rory sank his putt to win the hole. Jim gave the perfect definition of a wry smile, looked at his feet, looked at his watch, took a deep breath and went to talk to his guys, THEN Tabatha looked at me (his wife) and I simply said, donât worry itâs a long weekend and she laughed and said itâs already been a long week. And Roryâs Mum and Dad coming over and saying helloâŚ
And I will admit it, Pride. This wasnât JUST my gig there were 6 of us. My team came together with no experience on Tuesday, we had only walked 7 holes all week, NONE of them had been at a major event before. And they fvcking rocked.
But that walk down 16. Wow
That rope was close to breaking. I had the stress that this lot
Were close to spilling out into the middle of the fairway and ruining the entire first shot TV pictures.
The head of Media was screaming in my earpiece to get the snappers back inside the rope, the chief Marshall was screaming at me in French to get inside the ropes and I was about to have my gloves moment with Dustin Johnsons girlfriend
Give me a b reak
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John fucking Terry? I hope you called him a cunt!
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Oh shit someone papped meâŚ
Itâs quiet. I need a pee. I check, all clear, dive in the portaloo.
Iâm quick, I open the door, oops sorry guysâŚ
Lee & Koooooooooooooch.
They laughed.
Phew
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For those of you watching in Black & White there is an icy cold wind already blasting down 1st fairway direction.
It is FVCKING freezing
The Dinosaur is back And the crowd are singing 3-1 & you fvcked it upâŚ
Technically I got a bollocking for NOT kicking him out as he didnât have the right accreditation. In reality Keith Pelley Tour CEO had invited himâŚ
But I WAS tempted
I canât believe some complete prick walked out into the fairway to ask a spectator to leave.
David Duvall FFS, USA Vice Captain.
In my defence, he wasnât wearing those sunglasses and I did approach him from behind
Absolutely magical afternoon with Tommy & Francesco, I think I saw a new legend being formed today. It was intense, trying to keep the players guests off the fairway and out of the way of my snappers was like asking a flock of Cats to herd Jellyfish.
My DNA wanted to follow this guy all day, not the golfers
Now, would you believe, I DID ask someone to get me (anything) signed by Butch Harmon. A very nnice 87 year old PGA Pro was having lunch with him. Who knows maybe it will turn up tomorrow.
How close am I to all the shit that goes down? I had to stop the boys being flattened by snappers then had a moment to sneak in this snap
I had a choice between Ryder Cup Radio or Solent online this afternoon. Sounds like I chose correctly
It all kicks off tomorrow a bit later so LITSL can have breakfast in bed & I can have a critically needed lay in.
We lost one lady marshal today bad ankle sprain (Ambulance & in plaster) I lost one of my team with a torn something in his foot. While the course may look stunning and is amazing with those amphitheatres, It is an absolute MOVVAFUCK of a job hacking your legs through that rough on those slopes.
I think I have one eyelash that is not aching/hurting at the moment, but then this is Elite Sport so no pain no gain.
Cotes Du Rhone Villages time
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To help you plan your TV viewing tomorrow, you may want to schedule your bathroom/beer trips for when a certain Mr IJP is on telly so as to avoid any risk of screens being filled by me.
FFS the ONLY part of my body that doesnât ache or hurt right now is one of my eyelashes and I get fvcking Poulter on Sunday at the Ryder Cup.
On the PLUS side I get a lay in. First match only tees off at 11:05 UK 12:05 here so no more 04:30 alarm calls for me woo hoo. I will celebrate with a nice little Haut Medoc
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One of my secondary roles is to check everyoneâs accreditation to be inside the ropes. Today I found this old couple in the middle of the fairway, I asked them to leave. The old boy was incredibly French.
2 minutes later there he was again. I told him to leave.
He did it again. repeat.
He tried to do it again. I walked to him and said âYou do this again you will be a Security Threat and the Gendarme will arrest you under French Anti-TerroR Lawsâ. He said Je non Comprende⌠So one of my French speakers repeated it.
The guy said - you have no authority do not talk to me like that.
Unfortunately for him, standing 2 metres to his left were? 3 Gendarmes.
Who simply repeated what I had said word for word. except this time
They had their hands on their guns.
The old boy had clearly had a glass too many because at that moment he actually turned the crotch portion of his light grey trousers a darker colour
Now the question is do I cash out my 50 quid bet for a profit of 44 quid or wait until the Europeans win for a profit of 62 quid
Who is going to win the singles?
LOL. Europe wins and the marshals have lost control.
Good work Phil.
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Heâll claim he was with Noren and Dechambeau at the 12th.
Butch Harmon giving Reed pelters after he won his match, telling him to show some classâŚ
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Didnât even know it was on.
Youâd have thought someone would have posted something about it!?
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