When the Mrs gives you a twirl and says ālook, new jeans!ā The correct response is not āsame old arse.ā 
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That being drunk in charge of Ebay will only ever end in tears
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Yeah, just as I thought, Bucks.
Either
a) someone is impersonating me
b) my account has been hacked
Originally posted by @Bucks
Hmmmm
https://fantasy.premierleague.com/a/leagues/standings/200778/classic
omg that guy who is Top of Leagueā¦ his name is Dick Butt!
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Itās got to be bad, heās below me in the leagueā¦
You should crush Oxo cubes in the silver foil before opening it and sprinkling on you cooking.
Why have I always opened them and crushed / exploded them like a clusterbomb in mid air before?
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Saints are always going to let you down, normally in early to mid August and at this time of year. We then tend to get our shit together, and have a good run in.
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Serious answer ā¦ Smoking. Itās really, really hard to quit And iāve tried. Oh have I just, patches, e-cigs, gum. If I could go back in time and slap myself in the face
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We can organise that for you nowā¦
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Idiotās will alwayās be idiotsā and Liarās will always stay liarās
I learnt that trick back in the early nineties from a cheesy, late night TV segment called Get Stuffed with The Mystery Chefs.
Anyone else remember Get Stuffed?
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Was that the BBC2 programme where Delia used to coax sex slaves into kitchen orgies and then murder them while making a cottage pie?
Or was that Get Snuffed?
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Uttering the wordsā¦ I think we should go out for the day with the kids āfamily outingā. FFS!
In your head you have this image of the day but it is never as it turns out!
I should never have studied Philosophy at University. Itās ended up with me selling my soul to the man to pay the (London) bills.
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I thought it was just meā¦good to see Iām not the only fuckwit out thereā¦
Ha! thought that news would piss you right off.
Yes, Iām incredibly pissed off
Originally posted by @Fatso
Originally posted by @MrTrampoline
Originally posted by @Fatso
I should never have studied Philosophy at University. Itās ended up with me selling my soul to the man to pay the (London) bills.
Ha! thought that news would piss you right off.
Yes, Iām incredibly pissed off
Haha you are as well. Deep down, you know that you shouldnāt be. Youād certainly _like _to not be, and youāre doubtless well aware how ridiculous it is to be wound up by the fact someone youāve never met on an internet forum you donāt much like has found some success in life, but you just canāt help it.
And the cheeky little sod knows it too. Thatās why it hurts.