On way to Cheltenham office for “away day” with local team. Then compulsory “fun”
Are you the designated office miserable cunt? 
One of many of the attendees- and I’m the one who insisted we needed an away day
Daughter joining the eeekend party.
23:20 fue so RyanAir is 25 minutes late on the night I REALLY needed beer watching football
Just remembered how much i hated night pick ups at the airport
Ffs
I need beer
I paid for oarking
I got a receipt
Machine would not let me out
Polish man said ticket i show receipt
40 minutes later I get out the Car Park
Cunt.
Had to call the Cops on him Ha.
I am home. Kitten is confused we have a guest
I have a large needed Whisky
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A lens fell out of my reading glasses, a screw has gone missing. Got a screw out of an old pair but can’t replace it cuz a lens fell out of my reading glasses. 
I suppose Chambers is too doddery to do this for you??
He’s got a lot of screwdrivers but is not being very helpful…
Get the Lady Slowlane (or Chambers if it’s below her) to hold it just outside of your arms reach?
Sorted
Chalmbrers is takking them to the ocpticians tomorrow but in the mealtime he reads out your postings and then he tipes the repays I dictilate.
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UK has a treaty with Poland.
Any Pension or allowance is linked to UK.
I haven’t been in UK since punch card computers & microfilm.
To apply for anything here i must.
Upload my UK Driving Licence.
It does not allow for the reality that you do not have one.
Also. I have to enter the name and address and dates of every job where i ever paid Tax or NI.
Well, none of them exist. None ever had a footprint or even come up in Google
All my old documents were burnt by the ex Mrs P_F
I cannot even remember what year I left school and i did holiday work b4that and paid tax.
Wonderloaf Bread Round - when Ffs?
Having to scrape the ice off the windscreen this morning at 6:30.
And thinking “this is odd, hardly had to do it this winter…” , then realising.
Of course. 
Saints won a match. That’ll be Hell freezing over.
Steve Coogan has been banned for driving for two months instead of six, after telling the judge that a lengthier ban would impact the filming of his popular TV comedy series The Trip.
The actor and comedian was caught going at 97mph, well over the 70mph speed limit, while travelling in a Range Rover on the M6 in Staffordshire in July last year.
Coogan previously escaped a lengthy driving ban on another occasion in 2019, after successfully arguing that a new series featuring his much-loved character Alan Partridge could not be filmed on public transport.
What makes him any different from the rest of us, that a court should afford him special treatment up in front of the beak for speeding? If he was done for 97 on the motorway despite already having six points on his licence, why should his telly career have any bearing on his punishment?
But but but….isn’t he a national treasure
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Surely the judge should be saying - you are a multimillionaire - hire a driver
Or an Uber if he says he can’t afford it
I have had to put a tee shirt on because it is cold sat by the pool.