I have to reply because as informative as it is, I canât bring myself to âlikeâ that post. Not your fault.
The MI6 thing doesnât really surprise me - in fact, it probably explains how she continued in the force when she did her job so badly that she makes this bloke look competent.
Southampton are in the hunt to sign Bristol Cityâs French midfielder Han-Noah Massengo, 20.
This is tragic.
And probably manslaughter.
We had numerous text warnings yesterday to stay indoors due to an approaching storm. It was crazy.
And someone sent a person to possibly die
Breaking News: Old duffer, sustained serious facial injuries this afternoon walking his dog in high winds. Lashed by a flailing bramble the injuries are said to have improved his looks substantially. With careless management of the healing process he thinks the resulting scar could be passed-off as a duelling scar.
What sort of senile old idiot goes out walking his dog when there is a Met Office red warning in place? Oh, waitâŠ
Get well soon!
My brother-in-law decided to be big and clever and go for a walk down Poole Quay, unfortunately he wasnât blown in to the QuayâŠ
Maybe next time? 
I hear itâs going to be windy again tomorrowâŠjust sayinâŠ
Warning Disturbing Injury DetailâŠ
How did a falling twig manage to fit permanent bandages to your face.
Great.
Just donât take them off
You callous bitch. Did you not read I sustained serious injury and for your information it was not a twig it was 12 foot bramble, driven by 122 mph winds, lashing my face like a Cat oâ Nine Tails.
When I got back to Slowlane Mansions, Lady Slowlane took one look and fainted. I know thatâs quite normal but this time she realised I would need medical intervention. She called Chambers who having gained his Boy Scout First Aid Badge some year earlier, dressed my wounds rather fetchingly.
I thought Chambers gained his wartime medical skills back in the Crimea?
(Donât let on to @Not_Barry 
)
No, it was definitely the Scouts but he did gain the gratitude of the nation and lionised by the Poet Laureate in leading the lesser known, Retreat of The Light Brigade.
I have the greatest sympathy, having had the following read to me by Mrs TB: âwith the weather forecast as it is, you should not go out unless itâs absolutely necessary - spaniel owners, you will need your big coats!â
You see it wasnât really cold this afternoon. However I do admit if Iâd worn my Balaclava, (sorry to mention the Crimea again) I wouldnât have needed Chamberâs medical magic.
Bompey blew down
Oops
I see Betty Britain has Covid after receiving an affectionate bear-hug from her impatient son. 
She said, âHeâs been trying to bump me off for years and he finally got me in a bear-hug last ThursdayâŠbastard!â
