🚫 'Stoptober' - its crap

:no_entry_sign: 'Stoptober' - its crap



Father Jack does stoptober.


Vanuary is when I pick up chilly hitch hikers.


I know all too well the hot breath of that black dog. I would wake up in the middle of the night and eat an entire Toblerone. And I don’t mean a small one. I mean a medium-sized one. Once, I gorged on Toblerone and drove to Dundee in my bare feet.


I started on Toblerone and the odd Milky Way but before I knew it I was straightlining 70% dark from the freezer.

People think that things like Terry’s chocolate orange are harmless Christmas or Easter presents but they are just a gateway to the harder stuff.

I can’t even count the number of times I’ve woken up at a distant bus station wearing someone else’s pants and one shoe, with what I hope is chocolate smeared all over my face.

Thanks for letting me share.


Chocolate. Ah yes a distant 24 year old memory.

Breaking teeth crunching into a Yorkie on a winter’s morning before I learnt to slowly suck them off.

Then I moved here And, in the same way locally imported wheat works on my digestive track, I found the horrors of liquid goo.

Some then it’s been deep frozen Paatchi or nothing



Green & Blacks 80% with Remy Martin is my crack. Drank half a bottle before I’d noticed. A nibble, a sip, a nibble, a sip, a nibble a sip. You can see how it happened.


Sucking off a Yorkie?


As long as you do it slowly it’s OK, apparently, but they don’t like it done quickly. It’s not the county of Geoffrey Boycott for nothing you know.


I was more wondering if I should call the RSPCA to be honest…


There have been no recorded complaints from Yorkies - they seem happy to be the victims in this case so the police have no leads, and I can’t see they’re going to collar anyone soon.



DCI Bob Martin is wondering if they’ve been barking up the wrong tree.


Sucking off a terrier, really?

It’s amazing how low some people will stoop.


I’m going to do this year (apart from a weekend in Germany where I’ll get fucked up bad). I’ve just told Mrs Fatso that I’ll do it and she has laughed and said I’ll not capable. She’s trying to goad me into doing something that I’ve already said I’ll do. She knows I won’t do it.


Hey Fats, are you giving up smoking?


Fuck that


Sucking off a Terrier, I dunno


I will make this announcement…in the month of October I will stop drinking (other than one weekend I Germany ) but I will still smoke like a cunt. One day I will stop smoking and drinking completely and live a long and happy life.


I also will stop Drinking for three weeks in October in sympathy with @Fatso