bird was in desert, then there was a black bro in the desert, then they had to run away, then they met hans solos, then they went someplace, then they went another place, then emo darth vader killed hans solos and then everyone fought emo darth vader in the forest can’t remember who won think it was the desert bird cos then she went to find luke skywalkers in the mountains
oh. turns out i remember it pretty well! just checkin soz!
Edit: Spoilers
Off to see it again in style. Went to the local cinema, which was fine; nice new digital screens, decent sound. Tonight it is IMAX 3D. I’ve been wanting to watch it again for a bit.
I thought the beginning was really good. Then it went into space and they dragged out the space cowboy and Chewie and it went a bit average. Then all the love stuff was poor. The new yoda woman with the glasses bit was alright. Then the baddies from Harry Potter got involved and I started to not like it as much.
Then the baddies from Harry Potter decided to be straight up Nazis and do Nazi style get together and it was alright. Then they stupidly decided to build a death star thing like they always do but leave the shield bit protected by the usual skeleton staff of halfwits and cross eyed sharpshooter storm troopers and the usual end battle happened. Luckily the death star took a bit longer to blow up this time to allow enough time for both sides to rescue the relevant people.
All in all I enjoyed it. Soz for spoilers.
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Fuck sake boys there is a spoiler thread you know, a place where you can tell everyone that emo Darth Vader was upset because Rey wouldn’t swallow…
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that is fair review, tokyos. Very fair. Those are the conclusions that i think pap will come to after he’s seen it another 6 or 7 times at the cinema ffs
The next movies are going to be written by the same guy that did Brick and Looper. I reckon this film did exactly what it needed to do; land a good Star Wars movie to reconnect everyone with the universe. None of that midichlorian bollocks, big character motivations and a gulp in the throat moment.
They reckon that the next two movies are going to be a lot weirder, taking the franchise in a new direction.
In the meantime, we’ve got Rogue One landing in December 2016.
Milky milky. Lovely.
The way I see it Bob is if you haven’t seen it by now esp with all the hols and rain and stuff, you are not going to until you can download a half decent copy. Papsweb frowns upon video piracy and girl on goat porn, therefore spoilers are permitted as a suitable punishment. Something like that anyway. Plus the other thread has no posts on it so…
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But we all know how it ends…
By that definition. bTripz - any historical movie isn’t worth watching. However, filmmakers sometimes deploy this dastardly trick of making you care about the characters, which seems to have helped in the past 
BB8 was a masterpiece of practical effects - watching him walk down the stairs in the tavern was amazing. Kind of wish they hadn’t shown Snoke at all in this one, kept him as a shadowy figure. Phasma should have been a damn sight better than she was as well.
The final duel was just insane, expect I wasn’t the only one who whought the saber was going to end up in someone elses hands.
really want to know about Rey and how she is so quick at picking up all the stuff.
Plus the fact she is the spit of Keira Knightly means I can hold out hope for another gold bikini moment
Yeah they avoided the bit about him clunking up the stairs in the first place though. The humans just walked up the stairs and you could almost see the little bigger thinking ‘oh shit, not these things again’.
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He probably used the little ropey things he shoots out when the falcon is rolling about.
or catnip
I was not that impressed with the film, played it safe and with the storyline, the ending was poor and Kylo Ren is one shit prospective Jedi.
Rey learns she has a power that can rival a prospective Sith in an interrogation?
A stormtrooper can fight one with a lightsaber (irrespective of injury as previous films have injured fighters who take on all and sundry).
Rey and Kylo twins? Brother and Sister? Cousins?
It all doesn’t add up and feels like its been wedged in, the ground splitting at the end was the straw that broke the camels back in bollocks for me, also the thumbs up from the BB8 unit, Ren can stop and control a blaster shot and yet can’t muster up a fight against a completely untrained person.
Weak.
Originally posted by @Barry-Sanchez
I was not that impressed with the film, played it safe and with the storyline, the ending was poor and Kylo Ren is one shit prospective Jedi.
But he stopped a blaster bolt in mid air with the force !! Even Vader never did that.
His greatest jedi trick was to have ‘fabulous’ hair even though he crammed it into a sweaty helmet most of the time
Read my next post as that covers that belter.
I think he has ‘different’ powers. Like he took the course where you stop lightening shots midair whereas Darth took the one where you block it with you hand in a volleyball style. Vader can through stuff about with his mind, Harry Potter guy doesn’t automatically lose when fighting someone on the higher ground.
I thought about the bird being able to put up a fight against him and it being a bit shit but in fairness 1) he was already injured and 2) she used to fight with sticks on her home planet to fight off rapey aliens etc. I then thought that out of all the wierd stuff in star wars, this bit was acceptable.
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Originally posted by @Barry-Sanchez
Read my next post as that covers that belter.
I’m really enjoying this series of posts about how Star Wars : The Force Awakens is unrealistic.
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