Iâve always said it mate, compared to others the UK is mild and meak like our weather, the bellend liberals think differently mind, they think Europe is a place of tolerance, love, wanking and sandals.
Its a veiled code for their hatred of this great land, the bellends just havenât got the bollocks to say it.
I suggest watching Hardtalk of the BBC, Pavel Jablonski was on there making himself look like a forerunner for the new far right extremist party, hold on isnât he alreadyâŚ
Itâs only a few weeks until Christmas and surprise surprise these sort of stories start to appearâŚ
â The archaeologist said while all these factors do not prove it was Jesusâ home, âthis is about as close as we will probably ever get to being able to say it wasâ.
So thereâs no proof then? But if you want to believe⌠
The proof is that the Byzantines almost certainly thought it was Jesusâ house. Whether they were right or not is anyoneâs guess 
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In our house, Christmas is prepared months ahead, and put into the freezer until Christmas Eve. This limits the work for the household cook on Christmas Day, who just puts the defrosted stuff (potatoes, parsnips, stuffing, pigs in blankets, sausage meat) in the oven.
As kitchen orderly, my job is to prepare carrots and sprouts on Christmas Eve, and to assist with putting the turkey in the oven early doors Xmas day.
Apart from loading the dishwasher, this leaves me free to over indulge in wine and port, and to be declared the person most likely to have drunk too much.
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I do the lunch.
It starts with a Bloody Mary & gets served whenever.
Frozen Sprouts obviously. They retain more vitamins & flavour than the stuff dumped on supermarket shelves
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Mrs C_S does âbreakfastâ usually something I canât stand but we all âlikeâ because she does it every year i.e Eggs Benedict - hollandaise sauce and muffins or some sort of shit. Usually with something fizzy.
Kids will do simple starter for the main meal, while I do the mains, involving turning an oxen over an open fire for a few days drinking steadily.
Dessert, by this stage itâs anyoneâs guessâŚ
This year we have Mother of C_S sans deceased Father of C_S & the bloody MIL - they donât get onâŚ
And even grasping at lockdown regulations being imposed to halt it last minute, I suspect that is what Xmas will be like - you canât even trust Johnson to get Xmas right 
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We start Xmas eve
After an long lunch with the Ayatollahâs family (wonât be happening this year 
) we retreat to chez CB.
I sod off to my den with a beer to wrap some presents and watch a film.
Then another beer whilst prepping the veg
Then we have a smorgasbord of cheese meats and fish with a couple of bottles of something special whilst watching whichever Hugh grant based film that the Ayatollah has declared seasonal
Xmas day - pressies quick breakfast go for a ride / walk
And then in to the trenchers
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I will be working Christmas Day and getting drunk Christmas night.
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Iâll give you a tip there. Try and suggest Bitter Moon; it ticks all the boxes on the surface of things, but the ayatollah and her family will probably never speak to you again.
I will be 4 days into a forced 14 day with tag applied quarantine in Labuan,
Lunch will be supplied by the Hotel it will be Halal. it will not be a roast dinner of any kind.
I will be drunk by 10:00am so will not care.
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Pray tell, what will you be working at (hoping âworkingâ wasnât misspelled
Unfortunately our freezer is full of Doomsday Brexit meals 
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Working on the cardiac and orthopaedic wards at the Spire, so no misspelling, the only thing I am guilty of is using the term âworkingâ a bit loosely as hopefully we will have sent most home by Christmas Eve.
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Ah, the Spire, One of the private facilities where my clients who have PMI get sent.
Good to see youâre busy again after the NHS bought most of you capacity (as told to me by the PMI insurers)
NHS still using a lot of our capacity, the contract is supposed to run its course in DecemberâŚ
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Iâd heard that NHS is winding down and PMI usage is increasing - apart from acute treatment like for cancer it seems everything fell off a cliff and started to rise again but not sure how 2nd lockdown is going to impact.
Biggest thing for me is getting to understand how PMI providers are going to factor Covid into renewal premiums- some of the biggest providers made the biggest noise about not profiteering but despite low claims activity renewal terms on a corporate group basis are anything butâŚ
Mrs G has Christmas off this year so weâll be starting the day with eggs benedict. Bucks fizz for her. Large Negroni for me. Nothing like 6 shots of booze to get the day going.
I probably wonât give a fuck by the time the beef wellington is on the table.
Oh, and no telly on Christmas day coz itâs shit.
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Iâd like to think that youâll at least watch the Queenâs speech and the Bond film. 
The only Queens speech I will get in Labuan is if a Ladyboy delivers the food in my hotel room.
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