Christmas is saved by the Tories 
We all know Boris is just waiting to pronounce yo his cock sucking voters that he saved Christmas from the evil Covids/remainers
Wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong.
I hate MacDonalds, but they’ve aced the Xmas adverts this year IMHO
I thought that meant they were doing reindeer burgers yum yum 
That wold be good, followed by IKEA putting horse meat back in their meatballs 
Just had a wander up the high street
Basically everyones present is coming from boots
Tiny Timotei will be pleased.
Lady Slowlane always asks if I want anything in Boots when she’s in town.
I always say, “Yes a hot desperate 19 year old young lady if they have one”
Oh how we laugh.
And a truck load of viagra…
Never been a problem for me, just the mention of a hot desperate 19 year old young lady and I’m ready to go. 
Corrected it for you
That’s about what my GP prescribes for me. I don’t know what sort of fiendish satyr he takes me for, but the fortnightly quantity that falls through my letterbox could help to populate a small country.
Polish National Radio Zet.
Just played The Pogues.
If only there was a market for spares 
So do goofy things to cheer up your kid and they still look miserable. Give them something that will block up their arteries and make them obese and you get a big grin?
I have two favourites which remind me if the halcyon days of Prog Rock back in the 70’s, Greg Lake’s I Believe In Father Christmas and Run With The Fox by Chris Squire and Alan White of Yes.
I’ll go with anything by Cliff Richard or Marie Carey for least favourite. Oh, and as much as it pains me to say it being a big Beatles fan, Simply Having A Wonderful Christmas Time is poop.