A remarkable stroke of āluckā (participant with high blood pressure) has meant that tomorrow (weather permitting) I will be strapped to someone I donāt know and launched out of a plane at 15000 feet, free fall for a minute and (hopefully) land somewhere in a godforsaken field near Salisbury.
Many thanks to my āfriendā Giang for convincing me that this is a good idea.
Anyone wishing to make a small charity donation for this madness can do so here:
https://www.justgiving.com/fundraising/simplify-skydive
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I have my own āimpending deathā on account of an atomic hangover and the only solution I can think of is to throw myself off the office roof
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I can donate a spatula and bucket
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Give me a kick up arse later to donate if you are still able to collect that is. Remember, if at first you donāt succeed, never take up parachutingā¦
Yep. Donations still open on link above. Many thanks Litsl!
Sorted (You are still a daft twat though as opposed to brave) 
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Tosser!
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Done, I was going to leave a message saying that she should make sure your parachute straps were undone before you jumped but I realised that it wasnāt Sotonians so may not have been well received.
BTW your photo on the JG page is quiet creepy, well done!!!
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My best āand then Iām going to wear your flayed skin like a catsuitā look.
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I thought it was just your natural look. Oh, hang on a secā¦
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Indeed, I cant get that image out of my head now its a bit;
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If theres no photo on here it didnāt happenā¦
I learned to fly from Old Sarum. Back in the dayā¦ Lovely view on the way down if you arenāt screaming
Postponed due to shite weather. Will update with new date of impending death.
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Thatās cruel. Now a slow impending deathā¦
A link for everybody that contributedā¦
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CUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNTTTTTT!!!
Actuallyā¦delay means there is more time to donate and I can arrange photographic evidence!
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Creeping death
Le petit mort?
He seem to be breathing heavy and showing signs of an oxytocin rush in that pic
The sport is littered with nasty accidentsā¦this is the Portsmouth freefall parachute display team trying out an early prototype auto-opening modelā¦still needs some workā¦
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I think theyāve got that just right for Portsmouth.
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