☕ 10 (ten)

…that’s right.

That’s the number of cups and mugs I can hold with one hand when emptying the dishwasher.

Bring on eleven, that’s what I say.

What records do you hold, or what personal feats do only you care about?

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Your taste in mugs matches your taste in clothing. :lou_smiley:


Probably the number of pints I drank when I reached my Pinnacle of Greatness.

Yes, I reached the Final of a World Championship - not even a joke one, but a deadly right up there with a long history and travel and stuff… Think it must have been around 2002 when I could still drink that much.

Obviously I got beat but I had battled bravely through a series of qualifying rounds.

Yep, I reached the OFFICIAL World Spoofing Championships Final, replete in Black Tie no less.

I have NO idea how it happened, but somewhere in some old farts office my name is on a plaque.

And yes, nobody else on the planet gives a flying fook about my moment of almost immortality.

oh and I am absolutely SHIT at Spoof.


I have my name in space, or at least I do if the satelites that used my code are still up there and haven’t fallen out of the sky!


I have an extremely handsome penis.





I did win the first ever Table tennis championship at the Dubai Seamens mission just after they had revamped the old seamens mission.

Won three pints of beer which at the time it was the cheapest beer in Dubai.

I shook hands with Humphrey Bogart in 1977…


I know Easter’s a special time for you @lifeintheslowlane and I’m really glad you managed to get down from that cross.


No problem…didn’t need a ladder. Us deities have winged feet.

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11 (eleven)


I intend to push myself all the way*.

But like Sergey Bubka - another great record holder, I will go up in small increments (probably one at a time for the notoriety and the approbation of on-lookers).

*I may also have to buy smaller mugs

Full disclosure: to hit the heights of 11 (eleven) I have had to use one of my espresso cups.

Full disclosure 2: I had a couple of squirts of Beconase this morning, for which I have a therapeutic use exemption from the governing body.


Someone likes Marks and Spencer mugs.


I once broke the record for the length of time spinning a 10p coin. I sent off the claim to Guiness book of world records and they sent back some lengthy paperwork and insistence of all this verification bullshit. Anyway, my mate had witnessed it so he made me a certificate and I fucked off the GBWR. I don’t need their recognition to validate my existence. The cunts.


I don’t think you can call people mugs just because they like Marks and Spencer’s.


Yeah, that old 10p was a spinner f’sure.

The new ones aren’t so good.


I bet you did that old coin spinning trick of going to the top of Mt Everest, right?

Altitude is to coin spinning what EPO is to Lance Armstrong.

Hey, fatstuff, we should challenge each to see who can spin the new pound coin the longest.

You up for the challenge, you fat cunt*?

EDIT: *Bletch aiming for “baiting through reverse psychology” but instead hits “insulting” out of the park.

I see no evidence of 11 mugs tbh. I see 8 at best, and that’s including the mug holding them. Think beltch is trying to pull wool over our eyes here srs


the record was set using the “new” 10p (I know 1992 doesn’t seem old to you, but it is quite some time ago). I’d happily accept any coin spinning challenge you present, safe in the knowledge that I’ll beat you, destroy your life and send you back to the sewers where you were conceived and belong.

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I’ve been up in the loft 5 times this morning…is this a record?

You’re on.

I chose the 1794 “flowing hair” dollar from my personal collection and managed an initial 43.29 seconds.

Let me know your time with the 1794 “flowing hair” dollar, Fatsod.