I’ve just read a review of “Dirty Grandpa”. It is by that accounts, a poor film which isn’t very funny, but has the distinction of having a Mr Robert De Niro starring in it, something which used to be a rare thing. These days, De Niro will ostensibly do anything, so much so that I reckon “where’s my cheque?” are the first three words he says when turning up on set.
He’s not alone. Bruce Willis has long been ploughing a similar furrow.
So, formerly respected stars turning out in utter turkeys for money. Let’s have 'em*.
* You’re allowed to mention Danny Trejo, but not allowed to criticise him, ta.
Y’see, I kinda like Cage. He was born Coppola; part of that clan, but ditched his name to avoid charges of nepotism. Rumour has it that he took his name from Luke Cage, obscure capeshit, which is also cool. He also gives a shitload of his money away.
Don’t get me wrong. I love the dude. But, you can’t escape the fact that matey will do anything if there is a paycheck involved.
Undoubtedly he has done some good films, but my word has he done some shite. He’s been known to find himself in financial difficulties, apparently due to spending lots of money on obscenely expensive and relatively useless shit. Sharks, Pygmy shrunken heads, pyramid tombstones etc.
He’s completely bonkers, and all the more beautiful for it.
"When asked about his participation in ‘JAWS : The Revenge’, Michael Caine famously replied “I have never seen the film, but by all accounts it was terrible. However I have seen the house that it built, and it is terrific.”
I struggle to have a huge deal of sympathy for someone that shite like Knowing (seriously, have you seen that absolute car crash?) cashing millions of $$$ in the process and is still incapable of staying solvent, despite his $150m fortune.
What was it called? Left behind or something? Sort of a Leftovers where Cage is flying a plane. God that was dross and so badly acted by him. 25 quid for the special effects I reckon as they must have given the rest to Cage.
Meanwhile - something I heard on a showbiz gossip thing either local radio or Sky News, Michael Caine has expressed an interest in appearing in any potential movie about the Hatton Garden heist…
Kinda fits the bill of this thread and would destroy his heist movie legacy - BOOO!
Michael Caine would take Hatton Garden heist role ‘in an instant’
The Get Carter and Italian Job star, 83, says he would return to the crime movie genre to play one of the ‘bad grandpa’ jewel thieves

Michael Caine: ‘You get to my age and you say there’s no parts, and then suddenly you’re sitting there and there’s a part in the newspaper.’ Photograph: Ian West/PA
Michael Caine has said he would sign on to star in a film about the Hatton Garden jewel robbers – dubbed the “bad grandpas” – in an instant.
Speaking to Sky News, Caine said that he was now limited in the number of potential roles he can play, and would be keen to play one of the older members of the jailed gang. “That story, the four guys in Hatton Garden, they are very, very tough,” he said. “I’ve heard my name and Ray Winstone’s name mentioned. I would do it in an instant. I’ll be 83 in March, you know, so obviously there [are fewer roles] for me to play.”
The star of the classic crime capers The Italian Job and Get Carter signalled that he would not come cheap, however. He joked: “If they want me to do the Hatton Garden robbery I’ll do it – but it’ll cost you!”
Speaking later to Magic Radio, Caine added: “It just goes to show, you get to my age and you say there’s no parts, and then suddenly you’re sitting there and there’s a part in the newspaper – if someone’s got the time to sit down and write it.”
Defending a fifth man, Carl Wood, 58, who was found guilty on 14 January after denying conspiracy to burgle, barrister Nick Corsellis pictured the heist as a Hollywood movie. “You can imagine the film titles,” he said at Woolwich Crown Court. “Bad Grandpas? The Enfield Expendables?”
No details of about the director or cast have been announced, but the script has been written by Simon Cluett, whose writing credits include Age of Kill and Bonded By Blood 2. The screenwriter has mentioned that he has Caine, Winstone, 58, and Terence Stamp, 77, in mind for roles, but it is not clear if any of them have been contacted.
As a juxtaposition to this, apart from Dazed and Confused, Matthew McConaghy went from making paycheck films to actually becoming a pretty impressive actor in excellent films. And that’s before you start on his brilliant role in True Detective.
Well, you look at Adam Sandler and he’s the same. His only ever good film was Punch Drunk Love, and possibly The Wedding Singer (one of my guilty pleasures).