I laughed, but only in disbelief. Fuck me, is that really the best the Edinburgh Fringe can come up with??
Thatâs the lamest line Iâve heard this year, and he even repeats it. God thatâs awful 
âI hate funerals - Iâm not a mourning personâ
Boom tish, thatâs the best of the shortlist
Good Dad joke though
My joke about training pets with peanut butter was better.
Not one for the kiddies though tbf
Finally.
The drought broke last night some heavy storms went through.
Driving for a late airport pickup the drain covers were all over the road and I had to dodge between fountains.
Then this morning in middle of the town, heard sirens, got out the way & a fire engine raced past.
Towing a boat.
Strange times.
From Sickipedia , more than a decade agoâŚ
Walking past the churchyard I noticed a guy kneeling behind a gravestone.
âMorning,â I said.
He replied âno, Iâm taking a shit.â
Why donât you come to Poland instead of Crete he says
The Germans went to both, they didnât see it as the either/or.
Siri?
Define Multi-tasking.
Spent a morning canvassing with our MP. Met one individual on the doorstep who was unimpressed because she (MP) only sends others round to try to get our votes. Where is she? She never comes here. With perfect timing Helen walks up the drive behind me.
How do you choose who to canvass?
I have lived in wards of every hue and some that can be marginal - who chooses who gets a knock, because apart from the JWs no one has knocked on my door
Depends. Sometimes itâs most doors but weâve got a very comprehensive database of definite/probable/possible supporters which we use and update via an app in real time. Got to keep the recent converts onside.
Thereâs an amazing amount of work going on
My wife works for a software company that does that sort of shit