Trap Advisor

Trap Advisor
0

#1

I did the football five dayer on public transport this week. It was a fairly crap experience which I am looking to refine. Thought it might be a neat idea to start a good ol’ moaning thread about crap travel experiences. We travel, and we’re articulate moaners. Potential forum gold, I reckon.

Anyways, onto my gripes.

Waterside. What a ballache. I’d planned to get the ferry over, then taxi it over to the venue, but me ma was graceful enough to take me door-to-door. 5.6 miles. 33 minutes. I stuck Google Maps on for my mum and she got back okay, but I was worried, and delighted I discovered my brah from another ma (literally) had a spare spot in his car. Sort them out, Southampton and New Forest councils.

This may be archaic one; I don’t know if it is current, but Southampton Airport used to have an exclusivitity arrangement with a specific taxi firm that once tried to charge me 20 quid to get to the Flower Estates from the airport. Cheeky fuckers. pap’s top tip is to use the bus service they lay on for students. Runs every 20 minutes. Two quid.

Finally, for now, London Euston, the runt of the major station litter. Fuck me, it’s a hole. I’ve been in and out of that place loads this year, and it’s basically a counterproductive “fuck you” to the North West. Part of it is always clad in scaffolding. Featuring a cramped concourse, and a half mile walk to any fucking train, I really dislike the place, and some of the stations it serves shit all over it.

Got loads more examples, as I’m sure everyone has. Travel blackspots. Identify and moan, Sotonians!


#2

Eastleigh.


#3

Manchester airport. Terminal 3 (domestic) to be precise. Security is deliberately slow with staff employed to regularly pull people out (to the front) who have departures looming. I often spent 45-60 mins in the queue.

Why deliberate? Because you can pay extra to go fastrack, which takes 5-10 minutes, for £6. Fuckers. Oh, but you have to book 24 hours ahead. So no turning up, seeing what the queue is like and then deciding to pay more. Double fuckers. Plus of course you spend a lot more time with Mancunians


#4

Originally posted by @Bucks

Manchester airport. Terminal 3 (domestic) to be precise. Security is deliberately slow with staff employed to regularly pull people out (to the front) who have departures looming. I often spent 45-60 mins in the queue.

Why deliberate? Because you can pay extra to go fastrack, which takes 5-10 minutes, for £6. Fuckers. Oh, but you have to book 24 hours ahead. So no turning up, seeing what the queue is like and then deciding to pay more. Double fuckers. Plus of course you spend a lot more time with Mancunians

The last couple of flights I’ve had to America have been out of Terminal 3. I was used to the much nicer Terminal 2, especially the smoking area at gate 300. But yep, Terminal 3 is poor, just about doable for domestic (which is what it was designed for, I believe) but completely unsuitable for long haul.


#5

Pap can you just cut and paste the itinarary from my last trip from Philippines to Luanda that’s got to be relevent to this thread I cant remeber which thread it was in but it was just before the travel thread started.

If you are all unlucky enough I will have another tale from Manila to Macae where the air travel time is 23hours and that is just two flights.


#6

Don’t get me started on travel… I need a fucking boat to get to the supermarket!


#7

You need to see opportunities where there are problems, Sfcsim.

Cheesecakes, delivered by gondola. Make it happen.


#8

Gatwick can do one.

so can most charter airlines.

and the wanker who keeps installing traffic lights in Southampton


#9

I don’t have fond memories of Houston or Atlanta airports. Lots of angry American staff shouting at you.

Crewe train station. Spent a fair few hours stuck there once. Maybe it’s improved.

Ferry from Oban to South Uist. Never had seasickness before that 7 hour hell. Then thankfully that ferry broke down for journey back so had civilised journey back from North Uist to Uig on Skye. My sister and I had just watch Lost all week and we wondered if we could get off that island.


#10

Miami airport. If there is a more soulless place on earth with more miserable staff and a longer immigration queue, I have yet to find it.


#11

Car hire firms and why I will not use Hertz.

Was doing a job in Lisbon and whilst wandering the back streets managed to get mugged losing my wallet / company credit cards / driving licence ect. On duly informing the company of the predicament they said no worry’s we will cancel all your cards and heres a new ticket to go to Greece.

No problem travelling around Europe with not so much as a pint of beer in my pocket.

Any way after arriving back in the UK Heathrow airport still with no money or credit cards the normal way to gat back to Southampton was hire a car. Now you have all seen the bank of Hire car reception points as you enter the arrivals halls.

So starting with Hertz who the company had a discount with I explained the predicament and the little girl behind the desk just looked at me and said no licence no car. no creditcard no car. and refused to talk to me after that.

Next in line was Europe car never used them before so missed them out. After that was Budget, so started explaining again and she stopped me I was expecting to be told to bugger off and she said.

“We have heard this before have you hired a car from us before if some approx when”

Gave her this information and she trolled through her computer and found the paperwork for when i last had a car from them.

She then asked for the company’s telephone numer so she could call them and get a credit card number from them over the phone.

Credit card number checked and accepted.

Set of car keys then handed over and have a nice day sir.

Hertz you can fuck off for not even trying.


#12

Train travel gets me. The governement go on about getting cars off the road and using public transport. Last season I looked at getting the train to Manchester so I could have some beers on the way up, rather than my mate coming up from London then driving up to Manchester myself with him. It would have cost us £65 each return. So £130. The petrol cost us £60.

Just yesterday before the floods went nuts, me and Mrs Sfcsim looked at getting the train to Newcastle to see Ash. Again a return of £25 each when it is 50 miles away, but the last train back was 21:15, so that would have been no good!

My season ticket to London from Royston 28 min journey cost me £4,200 about 2 years ago! Crazy money.

It is bullshit and the prices are to go up again 1.15/1.5% in January.


#13

Travelling through Miami Airport in transit to Pamama before the yanks got transit lounges, If indeed they do have them yet.

You had to go through Immigration to get to the next plane.

Immigration officer " whats your purpose for this trip to the US of A"

Me " I am in transit to go to Panama here is my ticket"

Immigration Officer " you dont want to stay in America?"

Me " NoI want to go to Panama see here is my ticket I have a flight to catch"

Immigration officer " Why don’t you want to stay in America"

Me " Because I want to go to Panama I dont like America" is the wrong answer. The bastard held me there until about 45 minutes before the flight was called just about made it otherwise I would have been staying there.


#14

Oh and why is it we cannot get a flight from Glasgow, Manchester or Newcastle direct to New York? Ok you can pay silly prices, but you can get great deals from Heathrow, or Stansted, but not here.

Crazy that we have to go the other way to the Netherlands first.


#15

Was going across to Dunkirk from Ramsgate on the ferry so had a hire car which I dropped of in Ramsgate port.

Waiting in the terminal with all the other foot passangers as per normal we are then called for the bus to the boat.

Immigration official on showing him my passport " why are you going to Dunkirk"

Me " Non of your business"

Immigration official" Yes it is I am an Immigration official"

Me " Precisely you are an Immigration official and I am emmigrating/leaving the country it’s non of your business"

By this time all the other passengers had got on the bus and gone to the ferry.

Me " are you going to let me leave the country or not"

Immigration Official " Only when you tell me why you are going to France"

Me “OK can I have your name and employee number please so that when my boss asks why you refused to allow me to get the ferry he can contact the correct person”

Immigration official “you can go”

Me " can you now arrange for the bus to take me to the ferry as there are now non left"

Which he duly did.

Bloody jobsworths


#16

The last one regarding Immigration officials I promise you.

Going to Halifax Nova Scotia from Heathrow. to do some work in Halifax dock yard.

Got to Heathrow boarded the plane no problem what so ever.

Arrived in Halifax stoodin line for Immigration.

Immigration official " and why are you coming to Halifax Sir"

I have a job to do in Halifax floating drydock"

Immigration official “Can’t a Canadian do this job”

Me " Would they have flown me from England to here if they could" is again not the right answer.

four hours before the agent’s managed to get me out of immigration to the hotel


#17

Beginning to wonder if smart alec comments are not the best way forward at immigration.


#18

Had a really nice Immigration Official at Las Vegas airport last time we went. Smiled chatted…stamped our passports and said…that’s one to show your grandkids…9-11-2011 (9-11 + 10 years) Thank you for your visit sir. :lou_smiley:


#19

The M27 is irredeemably broken.


#20

Originally posted by @ant

The M27 is irredeemably broken.

Small glimmer of good news, it works pretty well from J4 to J1. That is, heading away from the shit end which is broken for sure.