Or you lot 
🍻🍷 The Map of 🇲🇷 Booze thread whatever the title says (or is changed to when moderately intoxicated)
Ritz biscuits and garlic pate with more San Miguel
Tax free San Miguel I hope
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Of course about 40 pence a bottle
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I had a road to Damascus moment in the Brewdog* bar in Southampton yesterday.
I’d already explained to my mate that they don’t have barrels of beer there, but instead, they simply put taps on the front of a series of streams that flow directly from heaven itself.
However, someone had been pissing in God’s ‘Original Punk IPA’ stream (Original is 6% whereas Normal is 5.4%), as it tasted like flat Holsten Pils.
*Probably, still the best brewery in the world - despite selling 22% of itself to a private equity firm.
Just to clarify, I’m pretty certain the Halo with whom Bletch spent the night wasn’t me.
But, if it was, probably suffice to say, I never felt a thing 
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I drank the worst cocktail I’ve ever had last night. Truly awful, but what do you expect for 2 for £5.50?
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why r u drinking cocktail in first place fats? Ladies night in the Dog & Bollocks?
I like a cocktail. I’ve found that as I get older I’m unable to drink large volumes of beer as it bloats me, so cocktails are a good solution to that.
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I quit drinking beer in 2015 cos I have fashionable gluten allergy. I have couple of fkn Cider, and then I drink whisky all night. I find in point of fact that it is much more difficult for me to get completely fk’d up using this system. I used to be pretty far gone after just 4 beer, but I can drink 15-20 Jack Daniel + Coke, and still be perfectly ok to drive home.
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Or shag free prostitutes?
Oh that one is still open ?
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Lol.
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I’d prefer to drink whiskey but find that I get through it too quickly and end up pissed by 6.30pm. Cocktails last longer.
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I will be wankered tonight. Got the in laws staying so will be on the turps as soon as i down tools. I reckon it will go something like pub - staggger home - bollocking - more booze - more bollockings - sleep in shed.
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Hard liquor cocktails are the way forward, but if you’re talking about Pina Colada’s and Sex on the Beach you can kiss my ass.
Sazeracs, Old-Fashioneds, Martinis, etc. are fine by me, go ahead.
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Fuck me, boys and girls.
You’re a drunken disgrace*. It’s Friday fucking morning!
* I’m secretly very proud of all of you.
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One of my mates lived in the Forest, and would weave his way back from Totton on his moped rinsed.
“Every corner’s a challenge!” he exclaimed, recounting his experiences.
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I normally just stick to a mojito. Last nights mojito had no crushed ice or mint in it. I almost slapped the bartender.
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