So, who’s the culprit?
🍻🍷 The Map of 🇲🇷 Booze thread whatever the title says (or is changed to when moderately intoxicated)
To which of the 14 thread title revisions are you referring?
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OK, thanks to fact there is a toilet on the coach they’ve got me on the way to the party.
Now not to vomit on the in laws.
Seems latest thing is to have a drone for tour wedding video…
It followed me while I legged it out the church. I nearly splattered it.
Cunts
I made it
Dropped the hire car off at Heathrow 07:30
First Vodka and coke in lounge after getting kids in 08:15
First one on plane 10:45 after take off.
First in lounge at KL 07:15 next day
First on plane to Manila. 11:25 miserables sods wanted to serve breakfast.
First one at home 17:00 its now 23:20 and I am still awake
Cunts
Not really but have to have enough to drink until I wake up tomorrow 
On the same time zone Wife and Kids been asleep hours and will be bolloxed again tomorrow I will just be hung over
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Chicken noodle soup served.
There is a sea of free beers I cant imagine touching. Trying an emergency herb vodka on the rocks recommended for upset stomachs, Ecrefuryl a heavy duty anti food poisoning med & panadol.
Gonna push through this. Cannot waste free booze. The shame of it
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The 1st main course has come & passed. Standard wedding stuff a choice of pork in breadcrumbs or chicken kiev.
Managed a bit of the plain bland pork,.
Luckily due to illness or perhaps experience, I ducked out on the bubbles for the toast.
This is always Russian Champagne. The experienced picker will see the warning signs, a glass desperately trying to melt away from the toxic sweetness of the downwind from Chernobyl grapes Igristoye is apparently the name. Best used by special forces to melt the front of enemy ships that are about to be launched.
I can at least look at the beer now
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Is it the clear light chicken stock one with a few odd looking vegetables and grey chicken bits?
Home made or ‘Knorr/Maggie’? 
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The Polish one, all the bits, boiled then simmered for 2 days.
Clear, just a few diced carrots.
Which made it touch & go tbh
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Mmmm gargantuan pickled cucumbers to satisfy the deepest craving available on the cold cuts food station.
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As long as they been done with plenty of dill and sugar they look great!
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Nowhere is safe.
The couple’s first dance is…
Ed fvcking Sheeran. That’s 3 Polish weddings in a row.
What’s wrong with bloody Elbow or Whitesnake
Or Prodigy.
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- secret ingredient - horseradish. They are I am informed, superb.
I raised the Ham table, a sweet gammon a smoked thing both yum then 6 different cold cut plates arrived salads pickled herrings, plates & terrine.
I’m almost ready for a beer, avoiding the vodka shot offers atm
You shaving those legs to shave off a few seconds?
Cunt.
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Nope … au natruel
So you’re basically genetically female?
Fair play.
Spent the day in London and everyone is in pride colours and costumes. They’ve also shaved their limbs.
Body hair is overrated. (if you need some leg hair give me a shout.)
x
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I could murder a London Pride right now
Having to sip vodka shots for medicinal purposes.
The band have started the whole Birdy song routine. Not what a sober pickler needs
Dessert was a spiced ice cream with a wonderfully crisp, sweet & juicy pear.
Speaking of which…
Some fine pairs in posh frocks on display as we slip into Me & you & a dog named Boo in Polish
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Sadly plenty of light blonde hair camera does not pick up
I only shave my crack
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