The former, I hope
And what would the title be if there was more than one of them but they only looked after a single member of staff?
Itās a pluralisation nightmare.
Yep, and we made the mistake of of having one of these, until i wrestled control of HR back off them. Now we are mean bastards.
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Firstly, I am not suggesting the following is in any way true of you.
But why are so many of your peers so frustratingly annoying and incompetent?
Drive me mad 
In all fairness, this is probably true of 95% of professions
Iāll give you the warts and all version.
Recruitment consultants donāt give a shit about your career You are a commodity. You are an opportunity to earn a fee from the client and thus earn them commission. Nothing more.
If they donāt call you back, then chances are they havenāt got anything for you and they are going to spend their time on candidates that they might get a fee from now. Consultants work to short horizons, monthly or sometimes quarterly. That is how they are targeted and paid. If you are thinking about leaving your job in 6 months time, you are no use to them, because you cannot help them hit target and if they donāt hit target they with not get paid and may get fired.
As for incompetence - read inexperience. How old do you think the people handling your career are. The average age is in the twenties. There is every chance that your cv is being punted about by someone who has only been in the workplace 6 monthsā¦
Like anything, there are good ones and bad ones. Unfortunately their are a lot of shaggers in our industry which doesnāt help
There is also a new phenomenon materialising. We are finding that so many younger candidates do not turn up for interviews without letting us know in advance. When we then try to contact them, their is radio silence. Maybe this is new norm in the younger generation
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Makes a lot of sense.
In fairness, I have come across some good ones. Sadly, they all seemed to have moved into a different field now.
I do get some hilarious ones.
I had a girl, who judging from her LinkedIn profile was early 20ās - ask me if I would be interested in a role as an āEnvironmental Artistā. I am a Designer. In games, these are two very different jobs, with very different skill sets (I cannot draw a fucking stickman). I had to explain this to her. I donāt expect you as a recruiter to understand the minute details of the game development process - but you should at least take a bit of time to research at least a basic understanding.
If for no reason other than to maximise your ability to place a candidate and earn your fee. I canāt imagine the client would be overly impressed if they were sent a designer for an artists role.
I also once had a guy that put me up for a job, telling me the role was a āLevel Designā role (i.e. what I currently do) when it was in fact a āGame Designā role. Granted, there isnāt such a big difference there, but when the question of āso what makes you want to move to Game Designā came up, understandable from their end, and I was flummoxed by it - that effectively killed my chances at an interesting role.
But hey, Iām pretty keen (read desperate) to change jobs, so I guess Iām going to have to suck it up and carry on banging my head against a wall.
Does seem odd that this guy is actually āin-houseā as opposed to part of an agency though.
He is probably fucked off with agencies as well!!!
He might have been referred your name, found you on linked in etc - better than paying the likes of me Ā£10k
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Recruiters are increasingly the bane of my life - constant emails / calls and requests for meetings to discuss my recruitment needsā¦It seems to be getting worse. Perhaps they are under more pressure these days?
I prefer to get people by recommendation from industry contacts (itās much cheaper obvs) and only use agencies as a last resort. Sorry CB.
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I get loads of unsolicited CVās every day and I am baffled as to why poor Agencies send some of them out when they obviously havenāt checked through the content. Some of them are laughable, cobbled together in about 5 minutes, or they have asked the candidate to prepare a CV and cut and paste their ramblings without giving the finished CV any attention at all. Neither the candidate nor the agency portray themselves well at all.
There are some very good Consultants though, so not all bad, but most are very poor.
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Defineā¦āinappropriateāā¦no better still, start with āagainā. 
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The industry term for that is āspray and prayā.
You will be on a distribution list that they have cobbled together and the canāt be arsed to go through it to take out the clients that would not be interested in the CV - too much effort init.
It might frustrate you, but believe me, it annoys the fuck out of me trying to get these wankers to do their job properly
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The mother in law had a bit of a turn yesterday. I felt for her and the mrs so suggested she come to our house today. After 5 hours sheās close to getting a fucking shovel round her head.
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Dig the hole first
I used to have a can of a substance that, it was claimed, would offer me assistance in the bedroom so i used to āDelay Spray and Prayā.
That never fucking worked either.
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Sheās digging it right now. She thinks sheās about to plant a perennial.
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When my manager doesnāt pick up calls because he recognises the number from an agency, the calls patch through to me. I have to then be all nice and lie about him calling back.
Iāve also had calls saying Iāve been recommended as a fabulous worker (I know, I know). Someone has given my name I believe in the hope I will go agency and they get Ā£250.
Did I mention translating geek into accountancyā¦
Round 2 has been ongoing the past 24 hours. Round 1 I have to admit was rather successful eventually. But today I am having great difficulty explaining why one stat that says
Growth is 63% should not be next to a graphic that says growth will be 3.3%
But it is a great graphic, it took us ages to design that
But it relates to something different
No it relates to core
so are you saying your market growth is 63% or 3%
That is not what the graphic is for.
THE WHOLE &&&^%%& report is for that purpose.
But it is a nice graphic
Is it too early for a drink?
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It is never to early for a drink we have a thread to prove that 
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When a manager wipes all your assessment by copying another siblings over it. Lucky I do everything in word then copy.