The Chertsey-Saint Unidentified Object Thread

Inspired by Cherts’ recent plea for (ultimately pointless) assistance over Sticking Plastergate, I offer this mystery to the detective branch of Sotonians.

On my 60th, this arrived in one of those money gift cards, loose in the banknote section. Postmarked very locally, handwritten address in a hand I don’t recognise, unsigned, no message in the card except the printed message on the card itself “Enjoy this on your birthday.”

Anyone have a clue what it might be? Am I supposed to smoke it, grow it, eat it, or what? I’ve asked everyone I thought might have sent it to a wall of denial.

Help.

Susan Sarandon’s pubes mate.

Plus, can’t believe you’re 60, you old fuck.

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…mmmmm, Susan Sarandon… :heart_eyes::heart_eyes:

Can’t drill down close enough to see clearly but it looks like dried chilies and rice - maybe part of a Jambalaya?

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Steady. It also looks like carpet fluff from the hoover

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It does look like felt that’s been moth damaged into dust, with seeds in it. I’m honestly baffled.

It’s worth adding that it’s just as likely to be malicious as friendly, I’ve got an embittered ex-wife plus the new bird’s husband still very local. Either of those would have known it was my 60th.

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I’m guessing it’s some kind of weird psychedelic. Unfortunately, my anecdotal experience of psychedelics extends only to acid, mushrooms and spiked pills in the 2000s. None of them looked like this.

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Just wondering if any of your associates have been cremated recently?

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I was wondering if this chap I pictured at Warwick Castle had a tap on the shoulder from “The Grim Reaper” pictured in the fold of his trouser leg.

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Looks like sawdust with some dangleberries thrown in for added interest.

It does look familiar…do you remember those delicious Vesa Chicken Curries?
Just add water and stir for 30 minutes.

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You need an investigative strategy you morons…

Firstly, I suggest a cautious attempt to establish whether it hath any odour that you may or may not recognise?

(Will provide advice on next investigative stage once you report on then on the olfactory stimuli)

I’m happy to snort some for research.

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No odour at all.

Pop round then, but bear in mind what I said about my not being universally loved :flushed::smile:

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Can’t imagine why…