omg… saintletch! saint letch!
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Didn’t you know that bear? B is the middle part of his name and is in no way related to the Saint bit (he pretends to support saints even though he is from Pompey) and the letch part of his name (self explanitory - agian, he is from pompey).
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Q. What’s worse than a word-bore?
A. A pair of amateur word-bores!
Tokyos Ain’t! - it’s not a username, it’s a judgement.
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calm down beltch, no need to Be arsy, that’s my job
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As I said, fucking amateurs.
It’s bletch , not beltch.
wait, why did you used to spell it B-E-L-T-C-H then? was that only on saintsweb?
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That was part of my lykdicksia (*word blindness).
Cured, I am now.
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I’m with Bear on this. Public request please!
Only posting here to get this thread to the top of the list, to encourage grown up language rather than immature teenage schoolboy language. 
Winkies
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Never encountered anybody engaging in such activity (thank goodness) but I’ve been known to have the odd spontaneous ‘moment’, as it were.
The zoo (after hours) and swimming pool changing room stick in the mind!
Originally posted by ant.
The zoo (after hours) and swimming pool changing room stick in the mind!
Is that because security guards stop your attempts at inter-species sexual congress during normal opening hours?
Haha, oh dear. Bit of an open goal that one 
I’d better give some context to clarify…
The dad of my partner at the time was (is?) a keeper at that zoo and had (has?) a house within the park. At the back of the zoo there’s huge, rolling downs with nothing around for miles and miles. The sun was just going down as well - it was a pretty setting, all told!
say no more ant.
In my younger and more exuberant days I occasionally performed sexual acts in The Great Outdoors and sometimes exposed myself to … the cold, critical and unforgiving gaze of the viewing public as a consequence. On one memorable occasion myself and a female companion, both of us the worse for liquor, succumbed to a frenzied and fumbling passion under an old umbrella tree in our local park only to be disturbed mid-performance, so to speak, by an observant young scholar on his way home from night-school pointing out to his fellow students: “that’s our fucking typing teacher under that tree”. (my female companion, not me: I can only do it with one finger).
These days I’m a far more circumspect, modest and private individual, and, as such, I would be reluctant to give a representative of the viewing public the opportunity to observe one of my alfresco performances and subsequently report to his or her fellows: “who would have imagined that Stickman would be so wonderfully adept at such a bewildering variety of wildly exotic sexual acts, and that he would be able to slide, skilfully and seamlessly, from one wildly exotic sexual act to the next with the grace and agility of a ballet dancer, yet also with the masterful dominance and brusque persuasiveness of a lion with a piece of raw meat? Look at the face of his lucky leading-lady - just look at her face! - it is the very picture of blissful fulfilment and unadulterated adoration; and hark at her ecstatic screams of unbridled joy as wave after wave of full-orchestra orgasms cascade through her quiveringly grateful body like a never-ending serenade of huge foaming ocean-rollers breaking over and over and over onto the sun-drenched sands of a hitherto unknown heavenly, yet also earthy, not to mention, marvellously moist and steamy, paradise. Bravo Halo! Bravo…oo…ooo…OOOO!!! <bells! buzzers! whistles! hooters! sirens! klaxons! word-puzzles!> … Phew, a breathtaking performance! A virtuoso performance! A pass-me-a-large-box-of-tissues-please performance! A performance for which this reviewer is truly thankful”.
Yes, for a circumspect, modest and private individual like myself such a review would be most unwelcome.
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Welcome back, Halo.
Wow, Halo. I don’t know about the others, but that did it for me.
Pleased to oblige, Lou.
I spent a bit of time writing that whilst on my hols.
Mrs Stickman : What the hell are you doing, Halo?
Halo : Just writing my diary, darling. Go back to sleep now.
Still an odd place for a wank though surely?
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