Man mountain Jannik Vestergaard has finally signed to bolster Saints’ “pap-like” central defense.
< admin add video of first interview >
Jannik signed this morning/afternoon/evening < admin please delete whichever not applicable > and will be known as “Matchbox” amongst his new playmates.
Jannik, the dominating presence in the Danish national side has recently returned from the World Cup where he didn’t feature as part of their failing bid for glory.
“I didn’t want to start in a team destined to fail” said Yannik. “It would have tarnished my chance of a lucrative transfer to the money-bags Premier League. This is a dream move for me as I was very much aware of Southampton’s crap denfense last season, I know I can make a difference”
More to follow.
You really cant argue with that 
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Someone has been reading fiverweb again…
So
He is a great attacking header of the ball and a threat in the opposition box.
He is defensively rubbish header of the ball.
He makes Hoedt look like Usain Bolt and has the turning circle of a supertanker.
We will now have two mainly left footed CB’s who will play in a 4-4-2 or a 3-5-2 or a 3-3-2-2 or a…
And Redmond JWP ong will be Wing backs.
And Jack Stephens has been abducted by Aliens along with Redmond.
Redmond in the new Raheem Sterling.
Pretty much covers LITSL’s sources
Fuck…and I thought I had an exclusive. 
Don’t know much about him except for his height but as a dominant centre back was missing last year, this looks promising.
Once again this 'window continues to surprise me. We’ve identifed the problem, sourced a solution, acted quickly and not considered the deadwood that an incoming transfer might create.
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Official saints website says he is 6’6” btw
Speaks impeccable English as you’d expect from a scandi
Ah, that’s because the tiny molecules in the atmosphere scatter blue light more than any other.
Click to read more
You’ve been reading @Matthew-Le-God on twitter again haven’t you…
I agree. No fucking about which is refreshing. Hughes basically admitted as much which was refreshing.
“One of our intentions this summer was to strengthen our aerial presence, and Jannik can help us do that not only defensively, but also in the opposition penalty area.
“His character and the leadership qualities he has shown in an intense division like the Bundesliga have been impressive, and, as a club, we have been following him for some time now, so we are naturally delighted to have been able to bring him to Southampton.”
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Fuck me, he comes across well.
Deep thinker, intelligent, articulate and emotionally aware.
Could be a really important character to have on the pitch when the pressure is on.
Hope he can kick and head a ball too.
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Yeah. I read between the lines and interpreted that as being “I’ll shout at you and be your captain you bunch of fannies. Not on my first day mind, I’ll save that for day two. Ya cunts.”
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Can someone wring @tigger?
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I rather expect that’s what Tigger will want to do to him
Well it’s nice to see the Official Saints Website has finally caught up with MY EXCLUSIVE revelation from earlier in the week.
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He does look a lot like the long lost Hanson brother…
Respect to the Saints fan who can write a Vestergaard song to the tune of MMMbop
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That’s a bit harsh @Goatboy
