Die Kruegerbomb

Southampton Football Club
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Our illustrious leader and chairman has been chatting in the news again.

Southampton’s chairman, Ralph Krueger, has indicated the club will not pressureRonald Koeman into extending his contract, which runs out next summer, or stand in the way of any player who wants to leave.

After the exodus of talent and the loss of Mauricio Pochettino to Tottenham in 2014, Southampton are determined to shed their image as a selling club but will not hold players against their will. Sadio Mané and Victor Wanyama have been linked with moves to wealthier clubs this summer, and Koeman has often been spoken of as the next Barcelona manager. The Dutchman admitted this week that it would be hard to turn down an offer from his former club.

This bit in particular made me wince.

“Ronald Koeman’s conversations with us have been excellent,” Krueger, who was speaking at the unveiling of Southampton’s seven-year sponsorship deal with the kit manufacturer Under Armour, said. “We are philosophically exchanging continually. We are speaking and we are in a good place right now. Let’s just let that evolve. He still has more than a year on his contract so it’s not a point of pressure that we want to be unhealthy.

The gist I get is that we’re not a selling club but we won’t stand in anyone’s way.

I am starting to think that Ralph’s job is to say things without actually saying anything.

EDIT

Just in case anyone gets the wrong idea, I present Sideshow Bob as a defence witness.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/gaXigSu72A4

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Equally could prove a masterstroke if this makes Koeman feel he has relatively free reign - and chooses to stay on his own terms.

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I think if we want him, Koeman will stay another season and then review his options during that last season.

He gives the impression Barcelona is the only job he really wants. The Premier League Billy Big Bollocks I would think don’t do it for him and maybe, he wouldn’t take an offer from them out of respect for our current owners either.

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I have mixed feelings about his approach (the club’s approach). In gereral, the idea to not be putting folks under undue pressure, to not stand in the wayof those that want to go, etc is designed to ensure that only those that want to be here are here… the assumption being that this will mean greater harmony and dedication = better results.

There are however problems with this ‘common sense’ approach in an industry driven by ego and greed. Its clear that success is can achieved through continuity an alignment of purpose… Our successive promotions and relative success was based on that continuity and Leicester’s rise is based on this shrewd/by accident approach as well.

But, that continuity can only be achieved if you have something to keep players - be it cash in most cases or a real clear ambitious purpose to progress. I did not hear the interview, so cant be sure, but it comes across as a bit… well ‘we dont care’ we will progress at our rate and to our strategy and you are either in or out’… all well and good, but given that other sides are much more agreesive in their strategies, especially with the new money, there is a dnager we get left behind.

I would like to see us be a bit more assertive and make it more diificult… not for folks to leave, but to want to.

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I’ve never heard of Ronald Koeman, but I would call him into my office and be like, “Listen cunt, I have mixed feelings about his approach (the club’s approach). In gereral, the idea to not be putting folks under undue pressure, to not stand in the wayof those that want to go, etc is designed to ensure that only those that want to be here are here… the assumption being that this will mean greater harmony and dedication = better results. There are however problems with this ‘common sense’ approach in an industry driven by ego and greed. Its clear that success is can achieved through continuity an alignment of purpose… Our successive promotions and relative success was based on that continuity and Leicester’s rise is based on this shrewd/by accident approach as well. But, that continuity can only be achieved if you have something to keep players - be it cash in most cases or a real clear ambitious purpose to progress. I did not hear the interview, so cant be sure, but it comes across as a bit… well ‘we dont care’ we will progress at our rate and to our strategy and you are either in or out’… all well and good, but given that other sides are much more agreesive in their strategies, especially with the new money, there is a dnager we get left behind. I would like to see us be a bit more assertive and make it more diificult… not for folks to leave, but to want to.”

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Could not have said it better myself Bearsy my fine plagarising ursine friend

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Extra large doses of chill pills needed Sotonians. Or chips with mayonnaise.

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We all know chips without mayonnaise is no chips.

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"Ronald Koeman’s conversations with us have been excellent,” Krueger said.

It sure is a relief to know that our Ron is such an excellent conversationalist. I shall sleep all the more soundly tonight in the comfort of this knowledge. Ties in well with what we heard the other day about Ron insisting that our players take communication lessons. I think they must’ve been boring him senseless, and he was feeling lonely on the training ground surrounded with such shallow and unintelligent bantz from the lads. You can imagine the scene:

Ron: A very good morning to you gentlemen. I was musing upon the intricacies of Unified Field Theory last night, and wondered if any of you intelligent chaps had any interesting insights into this yourselves?

Tadic: Is dat liek wen yous put all da pitches nex to each-ovva liek we ave at Staplewood, liek, innit bruv?

Ron: :lou_facepalm_2:

It is very good to know that Ronald Koeman’s “conversations have been excellent with” our Venerable Leader. What I’d really like to know however, is that he’s going to sign a new contract.

“We are philosophically exchanging continually."

Fantastic! This is exactly what I wanted to hear! Thanks Ralph!

It is of the utmost importance to me, that our Manager has a fluent grasp of Søren Kierkegaard’s Existentialism. A keen understanding of the concept of “Truth as Subjectivity” is absolutely vital in getting your tactical ideas across to the players.

“We are speaking and we are in a good place right now. Let’s just let that evolve.”

It is also great to know that our Chairman and Manager are on speaking terms. It would make it really difficult to have such “excellent philosophical discussions” if they were not. Indeed Ralph, I am right there with you man! Let’s just let that evolve. Who knows, between them, they could end up solving the problems of M-Theory, and come up with something actually testable scientifically before the season is out. And the prospect of that excites me tremendously!

“He still has more than a year on his contract so it’s not a point of pressure that we want to be unhealthy.”

More than a year! Oh, well thank fuck for that then. What a massive relief. What was all the fuss about? And there was me thinking that with our Manager’s rapidly expiring contract, that we might be feeling the pressure a little to tie such an important man at the Club down to something more permanent. But having the benefit of Ralph’s keen insight, I can see now that I was over-reacting, and it’s actually a very healthy position that we find ourselves in.

Cheers Ralph. For a moment there, I was getting a little concerned.

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I know people that speak like Ralph. I have overheard conference calls in which 99.7% of the conversation is pure idiom. Thing is, nobody, apart from people like themselves, is fooled. As practiced professionally, the main objective of this sort of chat is to commit to absolutely nothing, and muddle stuff so that no-one can pull them up on things if it all goes tits up.

This chat seems to be a case in point.

If Koeman does do the offs (and I expect he will at some point), no-one’s going to be banging Krueger’s door down screaming “Ralph, you utter bastard! You said that you were philosophically exchanging continually!”

Well, no-one except perhaps Jack :lou_wink_2:

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Yeah, whatever.

Just need to put the Anti-Politician Cynical Head on and translating everything is easy

Big Vic already signed a pre contract deal to join Spuds so he’s off on the 1st day of the window - why else did he suddeny stop being stroppy and make an effort - clearly all done and dusted back in January.

RK himself saidf “1-3 players going”

This summer is not about who goes and who stays, it’s about getting in players that (unlike Juanmi) are ready.

Who would be my guesses to join Big Vic on the way out? Pelle for a final big payday and of course Sadio.

Of course, my football fan head says “Great news, thanks Ralph, nobody will leave and we will sign Messi”

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Originally posted by @pap

If Koeman does do the offs (and I expect he will at some point), no-one’s going to be banging Krueger’s door down screaming “Ralph, you utter bastard! You said that you were philosophically exchanging continually!”

Well, no-one except perhaps Jack :lou_wink_2:

Haha, nah, pure satire mate – I actually like Ralph.

I just have a pet hate for empty rhetoric and pointless platitudinal media soundbites. Have something to say? Great, then say it. Have nothing to say? Then say nothing. Better that than laughably inform us that were not a selling club, but we might sell a few players; and that we’re not at all concerned with our Ron’s rapidly expiring contract, as he’s such an enlightened philosopher and excellent conversationalist that such unimportant matters pale into insignificance in the light of his mesmerising presence. :lou_wink_2:

Ultimately, Ralph spoke – and told us absolutely nothing – so what was the point of him speaking at all?

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Originally posted by @Jack-Schitt

Ultimately, Ralph spoke – and told us absolutely nothing – so what was the point of him speaking at all?

Nature abhors a vacuum…me too. :lou_wink_2:

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Originally posted by @lifeintheslowlane

Originally posted by @Jack-Schitt

Ultimately, Ralph spoke – and told us absolutely nothing – so what was the point of him speaking at all?

Nature abhors a vacuum…me too. :lou_wink_2:

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Nooo. I can never un-see that image Goatboy. :lou_facepalm_2:

Put it away.

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If I could get the fucking thing off I would.

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I have just pissed myself… golden post goaty, Golden Post - am onhe fucking floor now you bastard! :lou_lol:

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Lets touch base on this in a proactive way… bounce around a few blue sky ideas in our personal thought clouds… utter cuntish arsehole speak…and this is the problem with Ralph, as Pap suggests its about saying fuck all, whilst appearing to provide inisght and suggest strategy… only 95% of folks know he has said fuck all. He seems a decent enough bloke and smart enough, he knows what he is doing andprobably knows he sounds like an arse to, but is happy to sound like an arse and is detratcts form saying nothing.

As I said before, I would rather hear about how we are making the club a much more attactive proposition for players, both current and new.