Christmas trees

what is your preference? Real or fake.

we have gone down the fake route for some years mainly due to the fact that I absolutely hate putting the prickly bastards up.

Real always… from sustainable sandel wearing sources. The smell, the colour -just dont get that with plastic.

Sandel? Is he related to Handel, the one who played a flute and burnt his arse on a candel?

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Handel? I’ve been in his old house a few times recently. He had a fine collection of harpsichords, but I saw no flute. One of his greatest works was inspired by his frenzied cries for water to dowse his burning arse. Jimi lived in the same building in a different era entirely. Great musicians connected by bricks and mortar. And blue plaques.

It has to be a real tree; my ever-loving wife will be buying one on Firday afternoon.

It’s become a bit of a tradition in the Goat household that we all wrap up warm and trundle off as a family to choose the tree each year.

We haven’t been caught yet:

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Definitely real - get a decent one and it won’t drop.

Fake. Got a good fake one about 10 years ago and it’s still going strong.

I prefer real but we only have a small narrow space in our current cottage so we have plastic as it is the only one that will fit sadly. Just bought a real one for the village green that cost £80. Christmas gets more expensive each year!

Originally posted by @Sadoldgit

I prefer real but we only have a small narrow space in our current cottage so we have plastic as it is the only one that will fit sadly. Just bought a real one for the village green that cost £80. Christmas gets more expensive each year!

News just in, Mrs SOG prefers real to fake to! :wink:

Originally posted by @Sadoldgit

Originally posted by @Sadoldgit

I prefer real but we only have a small narrow space in our current cottage so we have plastic as it is the only one that will fit sadly. Just bought a real one for the village green that cost £80. Christmas gets more expensive each year!

News just in, Mrs SOG prefers real to fake to! :wink:

Ask her again when it’s past it’s sell by date and does nothing but droop :lou_wink_2:

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We had a fake tree for years, then around 2010 we decided to get a real one…fuck me not for a long time. It looked dead by Christmas, pines all over the place pricking you, then we dumped at over the back of our garden around April.

We are back on fake trees now and they pay for themselves, had the same one for about 20 years!

Saying this I do like the idea of choosing the tree as a family, but there the fun ends!

Christmas trees are like orgasms in failing relationships that have gone on too long - eventually it’s easier on everyone just to go the fake route.

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Having spent a miserable evening last night putting the fucker up and putting on the lights, I suggested to the Ayatollah that a little bit of tinsel on the tree might be nice. After giving me her “you fuckwit” stare, she told me tinsel has no place on xmas trees so all thats on the tree is a load of old balls and other tat that has been aquired over the years. Admittedly it looks good, but how can it be right without tinsel.

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They say you should “fake it until you make it”. How does that work with Christmas trees? Are you expected to have sex with one until you produce some bastard hybrid of man and plastic Christmas trees?

Like financial education, it’s just another huge gap in the national curriculum.

Tinsel and Angel hair, got to be covered in Angel hair

I see you have the 3ft disc of resin on your carpet :lou_wink:

That’s a spreading pool of husband blood.

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As if anybody prefers fakies.

Unpleasantly plasticky and too firm to the touch.

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I do not very often touch my tree, or stroke it very much either. I have 2 cats for that, but sometimes wish they were fake!