Imagine the glottal howling from Mairsyside, christ we’d never hear the end of it. That would be brilliant 
Normal service has been resumed.
Back on the topic of bizarre illnesses and injuries, I recall a running of the Tour de France where the great Laurent Fignon had to withdraw after being diagnosed with a tapeworm. The offending invertebrate was removed, but left Fignon in no state to be riding a bike race.
Elsewhere, the quondam Yorkshire and England fast bowler, Chris Old, had a tendency to acquire injuries on the eve of important matches. On one occasion, he damaged a rib on the morning of a Test match and had to pull out. The cause of his injury? A vigorous sneeze. There are a few more strange cricketing injuries right here.
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