It’s probably still easier for a bloke to find than the clitoris, tbh.
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To be honest the whole area is a product of poor design. I mean who in their right mind would put the pisshouse in the middle of the playing field?
Oh, I don’t know. After all, we were designed with our brains in our cocks.
And balls on the outside when they should be somewhere in the middle encased in bone
It can be done…
During sport, the scrotum contracts to protect the testicles from harm, and in fact, retractile testicles have a protective value in contact sports for this reason – professional sumo wrestlers in Japan actually massage their testicles into their inguinal canals deliberately so they do not become injured during wrestling.
That’s their excuse when they are caught having a tommy
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Have you ever seen them fight? It’s like a couple of hippos staggering sideways, crab style, before either kicking each other in where the bollocks ought to be or grabbing their opponent by his nappy. If the film was speeded up and had the Benny Hill yakety yak music added, I reckon it could just be the funniest sight in history.
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Not whilst playing football. Ever been whacked in the nuts on a cold Sunday morning at the Sports Centre? 
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Not me. I always kept mine safe and snug up my inguinal canal and behind the pelvic bone. I recommend it.
You’d have been in trouble if someone had kicked you up the arse, you’d have choked.
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Heard many a time during your tenure as a gangster in prohibition-era America, surely.
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Blue touch-paper duly lit.
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That blue touch paper might just be a tampon…which side was it dangling from?
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Don’t start on the colour blue for sanitary items…
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I thought that new mask I put on smelt.
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It’s alright, I think the spark has flounced.
Isn’t this pretty much what “the spark” was saying before he “flounced”?
Not sure. We’ve sent the Map-splain off to our outsourced Eastern European translation unit to see if it can be deciphered.