Fuck you all you shit-breathed willy fiddlers.
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Surely Wednesdays would be better anyway? No european football matches to pull people away etc.
Plus, the one lunged legend wouldn’t have to rely on Children not working on the wife’s “darts night”.
(I won’t say that I told you so, Bletch, but you know I did!) 
As I can almost breathe after matches these days, I’m sure I could handle 2 matches in 2 days… Couldn’t I? Well… maybe.
Should I assume that it is definitely cancelled for this week?
Yeah, we’re cancelling this week, J. I’ll send a text round later to confirm.
Shoulder permitting, Wednesdays work for me.
Cheers mate. Shame though, I was looking forward to testing myself with 2 in 2 days.
How’s the shoulder bearing up mate?
Wednesdays are just fine for me.
It’s nixxed mate.
The GP’s verdict is that I’ve torn muscles/ligaments in the rotator cuff. But they’re guessing really - they’ve ruled out skeletal / dislocation.
Oddly, I’ve got 80% full movement and strength, but if I put my arm in certain positions the pain is horrific.
Off to see a private sports physio tomorrow as the NHS waiting list is 2 months. I’m hoping I’ll know more then.
The plus side is that The RaleighBoy recommended this ‘physio’ so I’m expecting that the £50 I’m shelling out will come with a happy ending.
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Actually, yeah - Wednesdays appear to be better for me now as well.
Bletch - that certainly sounds like a ligament injury if you’re only getting pain in certain positions. If so, I expect they’ll tell you that ligaments never fully heal. It’s my understanding that the physio tends to focus on building up muscles around the affected area i.e. relieving the strain on the ligaments by taking more of the strain elsewhere.
Hi Ant,
thought I’d PM you as Bletch thinks his shoulder is fine.
You could have broken it to him gently that he’s had it and will never be the same again!
It’s the time to cheer him up with encouraging things, not to tell him that his shoulder is fucked forever, he’s not ready for that yet.
He could get depressed, and back on the glue and prossies.
So let’s not tell him how bad it could be, he’s at that awkward age.
all the best
RB
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yeah mate of mine had the exact same thing and in the end they had to amputate
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Is this ‘physio’ based in Horton Heath by any chance?
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Haha.
In all seriousness though, it’s not as drastic as I may have made it sound. A ligament went in my right knee a few years back and in time I became fully mobile again. I need to make sure that I warm up properly and exercise fairly regularly in order to keep the surrounding muscles in good shape, but otherwise it causes minimal jip.
The absolute worst movement for me was walking down stairs. Obviously legs are a bit difficult to not put pressure on/lean on so you’d hope that a shoulder would heal far more quickly.
I’m pretty sure it’s Bletch’s left shoulder, so it will be much easier for him to rest than the right one would be.
It’s actually my right, Flyd.
But I’m sure you wouldn’t let accuracy stand in the way of a cheap gag - I bet you’ve been the victim of a ‘cheap gag’ in the bike sheds on more than one occasion.
True story…
My dominant foot is my right and I broke my right ankle in my early 20s playing football. When I was healed enough to play again, I compensated and over-used my left. I’d always been pretty decent on my left, but after a year or so I actually favoured my left. I had tapped into the brain’s knowledge of my right foot and made my left use those learned skills. Probably. Whatever. Anyway, I then broke my left ankle in my late 20s and the opposite happened. I now favour my right again.
Nowadays I can interchange pretty well and I’m equally shit or equally good with either foot. As Fry and Laurie would tell you…
One miraculously compensates for the other…
Fast forward to 2:55.
About 5 years ago I decided to try a physical experiment - to see if I could brush my teeth with my left hand. I couldn’t - you need a lot of fine motor skills to do it.
But I’m a stubborn bastard and after about 6 months of blisters and sore gums, I could passably brush my teeth with my left hand.
But, and here’s the absolutely fascinating thing (to me), if I tried to do anything with my right hand whilst brushing my teeth with my left hand (text, drum to a song, masturbate), it all went to pot and I’d stab myself in the gum.
I have to conclude that my left hand was using the part of my brain that my right hand used.
Weird.
I’ve kept brushing with my left hand (I told you I’m stubborn) and it has really helped with control of all things on the left-hand side of my body - especially football.
So, the long of the short of it is that I can rest either shoulder Flyd, I’m omnimasturbatory.
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We’re on for Wednesday 30th at 9pm.
I’ll send out the invite texts later.
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That is, my dear Stench, a heart-warming and inspiring tale of perseverance against the odds. I salute you, truly I do. But what does it all have to do with your ability to write, and the efffect that this might have on your damaged shoulder? Or did you think that I meant…? No, surely you couldn’t have done.
RIP Bletch.
No! I cannot believe that the Lord of tthe Shinner is no more. It cannot be. In my grief I have composed this melodious lay:*
Peace, peace! he is not dead, he doth not sleep,
He hath forsaken not his five-a-side;
Yet with his injur’d shoulder, now must keep
His person shelter’d and no tackles ride.
But weep we must, for he shall play no more,
Nor shin the ball to distant Chandler’s Ford.
Like corpses in a charnel, fear and grief
Convulse us and present this question stark:
Who now will hand out all the bibs at Fleming Park?
*I may have had some assistance from my mate Percy
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Originally posted by @Fowllyd
No! I cannot believe that the Lord of tthe Shinner is no more. It cannot be. In my grief I have composed this melodious lay:*
Peace, peace! he is not dead, he doth not sleep,
He hath forsaken not his five-a-side;
Yet with his injur’d shoulder, now must keep
His person shelter’d and no tackles ride.
But weep we must, for he shall play no more,
Nor shin the ball to distant Chandler’s Ford.
Like corpses in a charnel, fear and grief
Convulse us and present this question stark:
Who now will hand out all the bibs at Fleming Park?
*I may have had some assistance from my mate Percy
One mincingly camp old funster is very much like another to me, Flyd *.
But I am just glad you responded
I made my attention-seeking RIP Bletch post expecting all of my fans to rush to hear my fate - only to be left hanging.
Bastards.
I mean, on a day when there was an enormous loss to world football, you’d have thought people would have cared more. Cruyff died too apparently.
Anyway, the reports of my death are a little premature, but I’ve been told to prepare for a 3-month recovery.
But as The RaleighBoy (who did care enough to reach out to me privately in my moment of need) pointed out - that’s only 12 weeks away**.
I appear to have a grade 2 tear of my supaspinatus tendon and I’ve ruptured my subacrimonial bursa.
Probably.
Rest - to see it the inflammation in the area will go down, and then see the physio again in 10 days.
I’ll be back!
* Your post was moderately funny. For you
** I’m paraphrasing The Raleighboy, but it was something mathematical that I couldn’t understand.
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Originally posted by @Fowllyd
No! I cannot believe that the Lord of tthe Shinner is no more. It cannot be. In my grief I have composed this melodious lay:*
Peace, peace! he is not dead, he doth not sleep,
He hath forsaken not his five-a-side;
Yet with his injur’d shoulder, now must keep
His person shelter’d and no tackles ride.
But weep we must, for he shall play no more,
Nor shin the ball to distant Chandler’s Ford.
Like corpses in a charnel, fear and grief
Convulse us and present this question stark:
Who now will hand out all the bibs at Fleming Park?
*I may have had some assistance from my mate Percy
You know Robert Plant?
