The youngest cutest cheerleader caught the brideās Garter.
So had to dance with the single guy who caught the groomās tie.
Yep. Still going.
Not sure what this was may have got lost in translation
Ah.
A problem with the long haul tactic.
The cheerleaders just asked me to polka.
I preffered returning to my vodka.
Which I need to clean the wound from the daggers Mrs D_P just fired at me.
Iād have got away with it IF I was pickled
There seems to have been months of everyone going round in circles.
Must be a metaphor about politics or something.
This is the exciting Tie catching dance
I need more Red Bull
How lucky is that.
The Vodka man just brought round a fresh oneā¦
A damned fine effort Phil. Phil? Phil?
Whoās the little minx giving you the come on look across the table?
LoL.
If the OED was pictorial, next to the definition for disapproving would be that image.
Have a badge!
whatās the old saying about wives turning into a copy of their mothers as they get older?
Oh what a wonderful open goal you set up there Cobs
By the time the daughter reaches that age, Iāll be close to getting a Telegram from the King
Mine hasā¦
The members of this thread are, without a doubt, at the very pinnacle of Elite Drinking.
At such levels of sustained excellence, even a 1% increase in performance can have an impact on results.
Unlike Team Sky, TUES for us mean Tuesday, Ladies Night.Brown Jiffy Bags are well known to us, but usually in the context of Rosie, Court cases and a Twitch.
Doping? We manage that in a way WADA can only dream of.
So, did I learn anything? Unfortunately, the most critical piece of information was beyond my reach, the Cheerleaders mobile #. I have the bruises to prove I tried.
But how to stop being @saintbletch? Simples.
Pacing oneself is important, it really wouldnāt do to be walking round calling everyone cunts at 9pm. So the Poles actually provide you with
A 3 course meal, followed by about 6kgs of cold platters. That piece of Pate just after the blueberry ice cream helped the 5th vodka shot slide down so well.
Donāt mix your drinks. No, not the obvious, after all we had bubbles beer plonk and vodka. I mean 1) serve your vodka frozen. Serve your juice choice or soda version as a SIDE dish.
This is so important, as an American found, you turn your back for a second and 5 people have poured shots into your glass of juice. NOBODY wants to shoot half a bottle of vodka mixed with 10cc of juice.
Drink beer, slowly enough so it doesnāt get warm, and allows you to miss about 10 shots during a 30 minute recovery phase.
Dance.
Now obviously, every Polish song sounds the same. In fact Modern Talking was the highlight of the night. But do NOT go too early.
Fatal error.
Lots of the guys were up and Birdie Songing within an hour. 6 hours later when their other halves had finished talking to their mates and were wanting a dance, they were doomed.
Me? I managed to fit in a conservative 276 or so dances into the 5 days it seemed to last (Ok about 7). Mrs D_P was happy, the meds kept my aches and pains manageable win:win.
Midnight came and involved silly games and public vodka shots. A true professional understands this is the time to e the videographer. Not only do you avoid a fatal collapse, you also have prime blackmail material later. As in darling? Bring me another coffee or it goes on Facebookā¦
Once the games are out the way you are in the home stretch. The Peloton increases the pace, attacks come in from all sides, pouring everyone a full shot while making sure yours is only a half is the way to go.
And then the finish line is in sight. You polka round the bodies. You now look good on the dance floor, since the drummer fell asleep on his snare drum, the band are as out of time as you are. And BOOM.
Only 2 hours after your last meal, itās time to recharge your now dead phone, eat breakfast and wonder just why the Bride is liking Facebook posts 15 minutes after heading to the Bridal Suite
It rocked.
Of course.
Tonight the village have come rounds for Birthday Party for my Niece-in-law.
Grown ups are having a BBQ.
There is BEER.
Well, we are Elite Professionals.
But I nearly Bletched at them when I found out.
#wedrinkon
Is that a knife?
Never been used. Untraceable.
