1 nun + 1 nun is nunplussed
so I want 2 nun’s
Don’t forget we can drag these Nuns out every week when the season starts.
I’m nun the wiser.
We’ll have nun of that.
Sorry, force of habit.
Given the Ayatollah’s recent experience of the newly nationalised South Western Trains, the grievances have been swiftly remembered.
British values
Britain doesn’t have a written constitution. What we believe as a nation is essentially whatever happens to be in statute at the time. This makes the constant call to retain “British values” all the more confusing.
There’s no real help from the law, so we must resort to tradition and convention.
As far as I can make out, British values involve:
- Opening doors for old ladies
- Being polite if you’re working class
- Being rude if you’re not
- Not really giving much of a fuck about being British
We’re not the French, after all.
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Hand wringing - we do a lot of that. We must be the most pessimistic nation on earth
Apparently, according to that good old Englender Nige, its about ignoring human rights and claiming all migrants are freeloading cunts whether genuine asylum seekers, refugees or economic migrants in search of a better life…
… I would like to think most smart folks recognise our housing shortage is because we built 2million council homes between 1945 and 1980…. and Only around 65000 since (with most being sold off by auntie Margaret…. and NHS creeks because it was designed at a time when we had a population of 35 mil and only a small number above 65… not nearly 70mil, an aging population and no social care investment meaning hospitals clogged with geriatrics in need of social care not hospital care…
… but I suspect its easier to simply blame dark skinned folks fleeing a shite life to try and get a shitty job for below minimum wage exploited by UK owned firms…
Nige should tell his faithful fuckcunts that if their job is at risk from a migrant who arrives with nothing and is willing to deliver pizzas for £5 an hour, then they should be fucking ashamed…
Yes, there needs to be adult debate about migration, but NOT because a bunch of racist fuckcunts produce AI videos of Islamists burning churches and getting mobile phones….
(Appreciate this may be a bit heavy for this thread… but IMHO, ‘. British Values’ have always been about standing up for the little guy, the bullied and the vulnerable, yet recent times seems many have fuck all respect for such values…)
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Oh good, another thread to mute. 
At this rate, by the start of the season I’ll only be able to see the joke thread and this week’s game.
I was shoccked after my exxile from the Motherland to discover that ONE historical racist term of abuse was ccompletely and utterly true and so really should be inccluded in British Values
Whingeing.
As in Whingeing Poms.
It’s too hot, can’t use a hosepipe, Saints are shit, we haven’t sold anyone, Still is too young, Starmer, Farage, Boris, Clarkson, The BBC, Sky, The Mail, The Guardian are all cvnts etc etc etc
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I rest my case
Whingeing bloody Pom
Brooker, Charlie
Charlie Brooker is a prolific creator who was doing sharp, dangerous work long before Screenwipe and Black Mirror made him a household name.
Believe it or not, one of Brooker’s earliest gigs was creating comic-style ads for CEX, back when it was the best games shop in the country and not a chain specialising in fencing second-hand goods — possibly stolen. His ads were genuinely funny, often irreverent, and deeply memorable.
Brooker then went on to write for PC Zone during its mega-lads phase, contributing dark, surreal humour that pushed boundaries. One strip — Cruelty Zoo — got the magazine pulled from WHSmith stores nationwide. It was vintage Charlie: twisted, hilarious, and exactly what British satire needed.
He later ran a personal portfolio website called superkaylo.com. At the very bottom of the screen was a disclaimer in tiny text:
“Not suitable for children. Or cunts.”
— Charlie Brooker
He’s richer now, with a massive body of work to his name, but no one can accuse him of losing his edge.
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Like I said, wrong thread, but British values? FFS, Is it really that difficult to take that seriously for 2 minutes especially given the fucked up state of the UK and its right wing cruel/mean shift? Or is it all a joke like the Woke thread?
Maybe ask what the fuck are your own values?
Brookside
Brookside was a Channel 4 soap opera set in a fictional Liverpool cul-de-sac. Devised by Phil Redmond, it stood out for its willingness to tackle serious and often controversial issues — from drug abuse and incest to religious cults and vigilante justice.
While lauded for its realism and grit, it was also somewhat famous for the quality of the regional accents — or lack thereof. Despite being set in Liverpool, many cast members hailed from elsewhere and did their best approximation of a Scouse accent. The results varied wildly, from passable to "did they just say ‘eh, la’ or ‘hello?’”
Brookside may have ended, but its legacy lives on in reruns, cult fandom, and anyone who ever fantasised about bricking up an enemy under the patio.
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Maybe drinking large amounts of booze in a short space of time can be added to the list?
Oh, and taking the piss out of those who take themselves too seriously.
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Uhm… Big difference between taking oneself too seriously and giving a topic the seriousness that it deserves…
My local boozer was the local boozer in Brooky. The Crown in Leyfield Rd in case you want to pop in and pay homage ! How’s that for a claim to fame, (eat your heart out Phil)!
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I do actually have an entry for that in D