😆 Joke thread; may cause offence (with a bit of luck) 🤮 😠

:laughing: Joke thread; may cause offence (with a bit of luck) :face_vomiting: :angry:
0

#101

I sidled up to an ugly little guy in the pub who seemed to be having to fight off the women, they were all over him like a rash and practically throwing themselves at him.

“Excuse me mate,” I said, “what’s your secret? Why are all the birds after you?”

“I’ve no idea,” he frowned, thoughtfully licking his eyebrows.


#102

The day Pearl Harbour was attacked during WW2 was reported as being extremely cold!!!, apparently there was a nasty nip in the air


#103

Did you hear about the cannibal who dumped his girlfriend?


#104

I for one,
Like Roman numerals.


#105

People think just because I’m fucking an older woman I must be after her money.

But I know for a fact my Gran hasn’t got any savings.


#106

I was waiting by the desk in a dingy gym when this huge bodybuilder sidled up to me.

“Are you the guy with the 'roids?” he whispered furtively.

I said “No, I just didn’t feel like sitting down.”


#107

All kinds of wrong there, skip.

Hence the upvote :wink:


#108

I’ve just read that the wife of the Amazon boss, Jeff Bezos, is leaving him.

With a neighbour?