A Bulgar has just won the Clean & Jerkā¦he lifted mucho kilos. New world record. 
France v Spain in the proper footy final.
France 1 up through a goalie howler. Now losing 1-3 after 30 mins.
I am sure as a teen I held a record for daily Jerk and cleanā¦ at least worthy of a medal
You were always on the Spurts pages?
The hot ticket tonight is in The Dutch Ladies Hockey changing room.
Pictures or it didnāt happen.
People pay money to watch Basketball?
Oh astonishingly GB won a 
for drowning together to music
I see GB are going for 
in kicking Iranians.
Which went well then.
When did Botswana get a 4x400m relay team?
Rwanda invested their windfall
Blimey -,have a look at the amount of countries who have won diddly squat.
Maybe unlike us they donāt have the funding
Has Clarkson raffled his farm and told everybody they are winners to keep them happy?
My Polish Cargo Superintendent has just come up with a new term for the Boxers and Shot-putters that are meant to be female but appear to be not of that gender or of possibly both genders.
These shall now be known as Hybrids.
Bit of advice to all medal winners. Tell photographers to FUCK RIGHT OFF! when they ask you to bite your medal. It is the most cliched Olympic picture over the last 50 fuckinā years.
IT MAKES YOU ALL LOOK LIKE TWATS.
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Umm - they might have a point though 
They probably would do in normal circumstances but they are probably so euphoric that they would do anything you asked them to do
Hmmmā¦ā¦
Where did the Dutch womenās hockey team go?
Dirty Dutch bastard, couldnāt win clean so had to take our rider outā¦
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In case anyone missed the UK breakdancing entry, hereās a clip of her.
she deserves a medal just for dressing like that