# LOU'S VIEWS - a response to Dr Catherine Hakim **URL:** \ **Category:** Reasonably serious discussion\ **Created:** [14 August 2015 07:59 UTC](https://www.sotonians.com/t/lous-views-a-response-to-dr-catherine-hakim/2432 "2015-08-14T07:59:21Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![CB-Saint](https://www.sotonians.com/user_avatar/www.sotonians.com/cb-saint/32/95251_2.png) [@CB-Saint](https://www.sotonians.com/u/CB-Saint)\ **Post date:** [14 August 2015 19:16 UTC](https://www.sotonians.com/t/lous-views-a-response-to-dr-catherine-hakim/2432/21 "2015-08-14T19:16:09Z")
Try pissing on the floor, apparently the smell brings 'em in. ---
**Author:** ![JBoy](https://www.sotonians.com/user_avatar/www.sotonians.com/jboy/32/21_2.png) [@JBoy](https://www.sotonians.com/u/JBoy)\ **Post date:** [15 August 2015 13:10 UTC](https://www.sotonians.com/t/lous-views-a-response-to-dr-catherine-hakim/2432/22 "2015-08-15T13:10:31Z")
I shaved my genitals and wore a g-string but the local ladies just thought I was weird! ---
**Author:** ![BTripz](https://www.sotonians.com/user_avatar/www.sotonians.com/btripz/32/75839_2.png) [@BTripz](https://www.sotonians.com/u/BTripz)\ **Post date:** [15 August 2015 14:27 UTC](https://www.sotonians.com/t/lous-views-a-response-to-dr-catherine-hakim/2432/23 "2015-08-15T14:27:30Z")
> Originally posted by @Coxford_lou > No they don’t! They either want men to make more effort in being hot (like women do) or they need a bit more time to figure out that they think you’re hot. > > Wining and dining is a cliche! No, not meant as a cliche, I fail to express what I actually mean, let me try again Man :- sees attractive (to them) woman, wants sex ASAP, end of. Woman :- sees attractive (to them) man, wants conversation, wants to be complimented, wants to be valued as a person, wants to be complimented, wants to be asked about her life, wants to be complimented, wants sex (all in the same night). Does that make more sense? ---
**Author:** ![Bearsy](https://www.sotonians.com/user_avatar/www.sotonians.com/bearsy/32/6_2.png) [@Bearsy](https://www.sotonians.com/u/Bearsy)\ **Post date:** [15 August 2015 15:56 UTC](https://www.sotonians.com/t/lous-views-a-response-to-dr-catherine-hakim/2432/24 "2015-08-15T15:56:15Z")
Or Is It that Babes also want to Bang ASAP, but they’re conditioned to require fulfilment of certain Conventions & Protocols before banging, for fear of Slut Shaming. ---
**Author:** ![Coxford\_lou](https://www.sotonians.com/user_avatar/www.sotonians.com/coxford_lou/32/11_2.png) [@Coxford\_lou](https://www.sotonians.com/u/Coxford_lou)\ **Post date:** [15 August 2015 16:25 UTC](https://www.sotonians.com/t/lous-views-a-response-to-dr-catherine-hakim/2432/25 "2015-08-15T16:25:39Z")
There’s a bit of that. All in all, blokes not getting enough sex, is all their own doing. ---
**Author:** ![Fatso](https://www.sotonians.com/user_avatar/www.sotonians.com/fatso/32/18_2.png) [@Fatso](https://www.sotonians.com/u/Fatso)\ **Post date:** [15 August 2015 16:34 UTC](https://www.sotonians.com/t/lous-views-a-response-to-dr-catherine-hakim/2432/26 "2015-08-15T16:34:34Z")
In my experience, the women don’t like it when you do all the wining and Dining cliche shit. They want a strong man to approach them in a bar, slap their bottom and then thrust themselves towards her. ---
**Author:** ![Ohio-Saint](https://www.sotonians.com/user_avatar/www.sotonians.com/ohio-saint/32/35_2.png) [@Ohio-Saint](https://www.sotonians.com/u/Ohio-Saint)\ **Post date:** [15 August 2015 16:45 UTC](https://www.sotonians.com/t/lous-views-a-response-to-dr-catherine-hakim/2432/27 "2015-08-15T16:45:24Z")
> Originally posted by @Coxford_lou English men aren’t very good at asking women out on a date. By ‘good’ I mean it just doesn’t happen, even though society tells men they need to do the asking, and they often feel emasculated if they don’t. This often leaves women in the no-mans-land of encouraging glances and ‘come hither’ body language, but no real control over their fate. Those that lack that subtle and wily flair, ultimately don’t get it. I think many women should think back to their mid-teens if they really want an answer to this problem. Women are generally pretty good at rejecting an approach by a guy, but think back to the mid-teens, and it was entirely different. Maybe some, or even many men are still traumatized by the often cruel and dehumanising put-downs that girls issued at the merest hint of an approach by some kid they were not interested in. Both sexes suffer at the hand of all that hormonal activity during the teen years, but I don’t think that many women acknowledge that fact as much as guys generally do. During the mid-teens, it would appear that many girls are fuelled by some kind of devil-gene that dictates that they should not simply decline any unwanted advances, but they should make sure that the advancee is suitably mentally castrated, disabled, and forever dysfunctional by means of a scathing verbage designed not simply to end the conversation, but permanently disfigure the soul of their target. I’m over it now though!! 😆 Thankfully, girls grow up too, in the end. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Coxford\_lou](https://www.sotonians.com/user_avatar/www.sotonians.com/coxford_lou/32/11_2.png) [@Coxford\_lou](https://www.sotonians.com/u/Coxford_lou)\ **Post date:** [15 August 2015 17:10 UTC](https://www.sotonians.com/t/lous-views-a-response-to-dr-catherine-hakim/2432/28 "2015-08-15T17:10:00Z")
Damn, if it wasn’t for the fact that I’m not speaking to you anymore, Fatso, you’d be my perfect man. ---
**Author:** ![Coxford\_lou](https://www.sotonians.com/user_avatar/www.sotonians.com/coxford_lou/32/11_2.png) [@Coxford\_lou](https://www.sotonians.com/u/Coxford_lou)\ **Post date:** [15 August 2015 17:17 UTC](https://www.sotonians.com/t/lous-views-a-response-to-dr-catherine-hakim/2432/29 "2015-08-15T17:17:04Z")
It does. Some women want that. Some women just want sex. My group are probably somewhere in the middle in that they don’t want sex with a dickhead, and need a conversation to figure that out first. Do all men just want sex regardless of who it’s with? I suspect they are as equally varied. ---
**Author:** ![jet-sounds](https://www.sotonians.com/user_avatar/www.sotonians.com/jet-sounds/32/52_2.png) [@jet-sounds](https://www.sotonians.com/u/jet-sounds)\ **Post date:** [15 August 2015 17:35 UTC](https://www.sotonians.com/t/lous-views-a-response-to-dr-catherine-hakim/2432/30 "2015-08-15T17:35:26Z")
This thread’s a little too deep for me (if you’ll pardon the pun), but like SO5 4BW i’ve also been down the internet dating route over the last couple of years and I was quite taken aback at how sexually forward some women can be. ---
**Author:** ![BTripz](https://www.sotonians.com/user_avatar/www.sotonians.com/btripz/32/75839_2.png) [@BTripz](https://www.sotonians.com/u/BTripz)\ **Post date:** [15 August 2015 20:56 UTC](https://www.sotonians.com/t/lous-views-a-response-to-dr-catherine-hakim/2432/31 "2015-08-15T20:56:31Z")
Yeah, how many times I heard “You’re cute and everything but…” when asking a chick out, even the ones with the braces and NHS glasses. FFS what does that even mean? ---
**Author:** ![TedMaul](https://www.sotonians.com/letter_avatar_proxy/v4/letter/t/51bf81/32.png) [@TedMaul](https://www.sotonians.com/u/TedMaul)\ **Post date:** [15 August 2015 21:57 UTC](https://www.sotonians.com/t/lous-views-a-response-to-dr-catherine-hakim/2432/32 "2015-08-15T21:57:29Z")
“I haven’t read the Dr Catherine Hakim paper that argues prostitution should be legalised because men need sex” Hey Lou, shouldn’t you read the good doctor’s paper before having a response? I agree with you by the way just saying 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Coxford\_lou](https://www.sotonians.com/user_avatar/www.sotonians.com/coxford_lou/32/11_2.png) [@Coxford\_lou](https://www.sotonians.com/u/Coxford_lou)\ **Post date:** [15 August 2015 22:05 UTC](https://www.sotonians.com/t/lous-views-a-response-to-dr-catherine-hakim/2432/33 "2015-08-15T22:05:44Z")
The crux of my whole argument was off the back of my refusal to read her article. If I back down now, that’s failure. ---
**Author:** ![TedMaul](https://www.sotonians.com/letter_avatar_proxy/v4/letter/t/51bf81/32.png) [@TedMaul](https://www.sotonians.com/u/TedMaul)\ **Post date:** [15 August 2015 22:30 UTC](https://www.sotonians.com/t/lous-views-a-response-to-dr-catherine-hakim/2432/34 "2015-08-15T22:30:21Z")
Ok, but then in the next sentence “my sample base of single female friends, all intelligent, attractive” I’m no scientist, but a sample base usually doesn’t involve just your mates. Intelligent/attractive is also a subjective opinion and may be influenced by [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive\_bias](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_bias) ---
**Author:** ![Coxford\_lou](https://www.sotonians.com/user_avatar/www.sotonians.com/coxford_lou/32/11_2.png) [@Coxford\_lou](https://www.sotonians.com/u/Coxford_lou)\ **Post date:** [15 August 2015 22:38 UTC](https://www.sotonians.com/t/lous-views-a-response-to-dr-catherine-hakim/2432/35 "2015-08-15T22:38:52Z")
That’s a fair point, Ted. I very much value your interrogation of this (more so than Fatso’s) and with all important academic papers, this peer review is an important part of the process. ---
**Author:** ![Fatso](https://www.sotonians.com/user_avatar/www.sotonians.com/fatso/32/18_2.png) [@Fatso](https://www.sotonians.com/u/Fatso)\ **Post date:** [15 August 2015 22:41 UTC](https://www.sotonians.com/t/lous-views-a-response-to-dr-catherine-hakim/2432/36 "2015-08-15T22:41:19Z")
Leave it Ted, I’ve brought the flaws of this thread to the attention of the big knobs who are on the case. (page three of the edited posts thread) ---
**Author:** ![Coxford\_lou](https://www.sotonians.com/user_avatar/www.sotonians.com/coxford_lou/32/11_2.png) [@Coxford\_lou](https://www.sotonians.com/u/Coxford_lou)\ **Post date:** [15 August 2015 22:48 UTC](https://www.sotonians.com/t/lous-views-a-response-to-dr-catherine-hakim/2432/37 "2015-08-15T22:48:26Z")
You’re dead to me, Fatso! ---
**Author:** ![Intiniki](https://www.sotonians.com/user_avatar/www.sotonians.com/intiniki/32/9_2.png) [@Intiniki](https://www.sotonians.com/u/Intiniki)\ **Post date:** [15 August 2015 23:02 UTC](https://www.sotonians.com/t/lous-views-a-response-to-dr-catherine-hakim/2432/38 "2015-08-15T23:02:22Z")
This sounds like a few encounters I’ve had in bars. Have we met? Not as bad as the time a guy went around a whole bunch of us on a night out and grabbed our breasts. He was kicked out of the bar. ---
**Author:** ![TedMaul](https://www.sotonians.com/letter_avatar_proxy/v4/letter/t/51bf81/32.png) [@TedMaul](https://www.sotonians.com/u/TedMaul)\ **Post date:** [15 August 2015 23:04 UTC](https://www.sotonians.com/t/lous-views-a-response-to-dr-catherine-hakim/2432/39 "2015-08-15T23:04:00Z")
Who are these big Knobs! … \*Didn’t think i’d ever type these words\* ---
**Author:** ![Goatboy](https://www.sotonians.com/user_avatar/www.sotonians.com/goatboy/32/167_2.png) [@Goatboy](https://www.sotonians.com/u/Goatboy)\ **Post date:** [16 August 2015 01:56 UTC](https://www.sotonians.com/t/lous-views-a-response-to-dr-catherine-hakim/2432/40 "2015-08-16T01:56:03Z")
It was a serious experiment. And there are plenty of other bars. [Previous page](https://www.sotonians.com/t/lous-views-a-response-to-dr-catherine-hakim/2432.md?page=1) [Next page](https://www.sotonians.com/t/lous-views-a-response-to-dr-catherine-hakim/2432.md?page=3)